Another Senseless Mass Shooting

Executive Summary:

  • Sarkes uses his newly created Mass Shooting Standard Form. 
  • This time, the Mass Shooting was at Manufacturing Company in Aurora, IL.

Another Mass Murder, usually by an angry White Man, but this time by an angry Black Man, using Heat, has happened.  In this case, the Mass Murder was in (Fill in the Location) Aurora, IL.

The Mass Murder happened at a (Fill in the venue, example: school, mall, church, concert) Henry Platt Co., a manufacturing plant.  

(Fill in the number of innocent people killed) 5 people were murdered and 6 were injured.

The Mass Murderer, angry Black Man (Fill in the Murders Name and other details) Gary Martin, was being terminated from employment.

Angry Black Man Gary Martin was being terminated from his job.

The Mass Murderer used (Identify the weapon used)  a .40 Caliber Smith & Wesson Hand Gun

.40 Caliber Smith & Wesson used to kill 5 innocent people

The Angry Black Man Mass Murderer (Select one: killed himself, was killed by Police, was Captured by Police) was killed by Police.

Shortly after the Mass Murder:

  • A spokesman for the NRA said:  “Guns don’t kill People, People kill People.”
  • President Trump, the Orange Rifleman, said: “If there was an Armed Guard at Henry Platt, the results would have been far better.”
  • The President of the NRA said:  “The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.” 
  • A Conservative Friend of Sarkes said:  “These Mass Murders with Heat weapons are just the price of our Freedom” 
  • Countless Politicians said:  “Our Thoughts and Prayers are with the victims of this shooting and their families, Thoughts and Prayers.”
  • Another Conservative Friend of Sarkes said:  “Mass Shooters go to Gun Free Zones, what do you expect”.

That’s if for this latest Mass Murder packing Heat.  Sarkeses use of the Standard Form should make reporting the next Mass Murder much easier.  

Le Or-aange Donald Trump

Executive Summary:

  • No one knows what makes Donald Trump Orange
  • There are many theories

Sarkes thanks Canadian neighbor Dennis Parras for an article out of the Canadian Broadcast Corporation (CBC) asking why President Trump is Orange. 

Canadians have long been confused by our Orange POTUS and Dennis often peppers our Silver Creek Conservative Men’s Breakfast Club with questions about things that the Golden Blabbermouth says, and then walks back. Alas, the true Conservatives of the Silver Creek Breakfast Club always have an answer for Dennis.

Canadians are confused, and Trudeau is
cautious with the Orange Pickpocket

The biggest mystery to Canadians is how President Donald Trump manages to maintain his bright fluorescent orange glow regardless of the season.  Officially, the White House line is that Trump gets his glow from “good genes,”.

Donald Trump is Orange

Theories have been floated to explain Trump’s skin color, including tanning beds, spray tan, and make-up.

Tanning Beds were immediately ruled out, as LEAKER, Sarkeses source in the White House, insists that there isn’t a Tanning Bed OR Spray Tan Booths in the White House.  Also, a tanning bed also would not explain why Trump’s Orange face is a completely different color from the paler skin on his tiny hands. 

Trumps face is Orange yet his
Tiny Hands are a Pale White

Cosmetologists tell Sarkes that since the Orange Ameba looks more orange than tan, he most likely is using self-tanner creams or sprays.

Donald Trump uses Self-tanning creams and sprays

LEAKER also tells Sarkes that the Orange Traffic Cone is self-conscious of his Orange hue, and has voiced complaints to aides that he appears too orange on television.   This has led to staff dimming the lighting of many White House events. Trump also likes to use natural light, which reduces the orange glow, and has chosen to host press conferences in the sunny Rose Garden.

Donald Trump is not so
Orange when in the Rose Garden

In a future Sarkes Corner, Sarkes will explain to this Canadian friends how Donald Trumps hair stays Orange while every other American President goes gray.  

Letters to the Editor

Executive Summary:

  • Sarkes gets a Uuuuuuge amount of Letters to the Editor of Sarkes Corner, i.e., Sarkes
  • While most of those letters are strong endorsements, Sarkes does get some letters of criticism.

Sarkes, Fair and Balanced, is a Truth Machine.  In that spirit, and with open kimono, Sarkes provides several Letters to the Editor that criticize Sarkes Corner as a publication and Sarkes personally.  Sarkes does not identify the letter writers by name, only initials and location.

From DT from Mir-a-Lago, FL:  Sarkes, you claim to be a recovering Liberal who wants to be a Conservative, but you aren’t fooling anyone.  You know that a TRUE Conservative, Donald Trump, has accomplished more in 2 years than any other president in History, History, yet you give him no credit.  You, Sarkes, are a Brown Buffon, Psycho, Beleaguered, Low Energy, Cowardly, Low IQ, Dumb as a Rock, and a Horse Face.

Sarkeses reply:  Dear DT, Sarkes may be a Brown Buffon, but the fact that  Sarkes has a large Armenian nose does not mean he has a Horse Face.  SARKES DOES NOT HAVE A HORSE FACE.

Sarkes may be a Brown Buffon but he does not have a Horse Face

From BK, Westminster, NY:  Sarkes, you running for President in 2020 as an Independent is a scam.  This is a cheap ploy to increase circulation for your Failed Sarkes Corner.  Stop it now.  As a Progressive Conservative, you will be taking votes from the Greatest President in our history, our history, Donald J. Trump.

Sarkeses reply:  Dear BK, Make no mistake, Sarkes is a serious candidate for President in 2020.  Sarkes will get his votes from MODERATE Republicans and MODERATE Democrats.  Early polling indicates that Sarkes will get the entire 5 Million votes cast by Illegal Immigrants in 2016 for Hillary Clinton.

Illegal Immigrants will vote as a block for Sarkes in 2020

From BW from Birmingham, AL:  Sarkes, I am disgusted with your series “XXX while Black in America”.  How about discrimination against White People.  I am a proud white man from Alabama and cannot help that I am superior to those other people, I was born that a way.  I HAVE NOT come out from under a rock, I proudly own a Double Wide Trailer.  I am one of Trumps Base, and proudly wear my MAGA hat every day.

Sarkes reply:  Dear BW, Sarkes continues to look for stories of discrimination against White Folk but cannot find one.  The good news, in 2040 or earlier, you White Folk will be the Minority with Hispanics in the Majority.  When that happens, there will be many stories of discrimination against Whites.  Sarkes also owns a MAGA Hat. 

BW’s Double Wide Trailer in Alabama.  BW is a superior White Man
Sarkes also owns a MAGA Hat

From JS, Dallas, TX:  Sarkes, you are a real piece of work and a first class hypocrite.  You claim to be a Fair and Balanced reporter holding Politicians, Crackers, etc accountable for their actions.  Yet, you have your 15 month old Granddaughter, Addison, working on the staff at Sarkes Corner.  Have  you ever heard of Child Labor Laws!  You should be ashamed.  Lock Sarkes Up, Lock Sarkes Up, Lock Sarkes Up!

Sarkeses Reply:  Dear JS, first of all, Baby Adds only helps Sarkes publish Sarkes Corner when Sarkes is in DC.  Baby Adds never leaves the comfort of her home when working on Sarkes Corner.  Sarkes is 66 years old and there will come a time when Sarkes will not be able to maintain the high standards of Sarkes Corner.  At that time, Sarkes will turn over the keys to Sarkes Corner to Baby Adds.  

Baby Adds, future Editor in Chief of Sarkes Corner
Baby Adds will also inherent Sarkeses 2019 Mini Cooper Convertible 

Heat Sales are Down!

Executive Summary:

– The NRA, Gunmakers, and 2nd Amendment Zealots are grappling with slumping Heat Sales and a shift in Heat Politics. 

Thanks to neighbor George Taylor for this story about a negative economic indicator, the Sale of Heat.

The NRA, Gunmakers and 2nd Amendment Zealots were doing High 5’s and Deep Knee Bends with the election of the Orange Rifleman as President, along with a GOP Senate and House.  

The NRA, Gunmakers and 2nd Amendment Zealots had laid out their top Political priorities for the Heat industry and were confident that these would be enacted with the GOP monopoly of our Government.  These priorities included:

The Orange Rifleman packs Heat

BUT, instead of increased sales of Heat, an economic phenomena called the “Trump Slump” has occurred.   Heat Sales have been plummeting since the Orange Lugar took office.   

  • making it legal to carry concealed weapons in all 50 states
  • legalizing the use of “Silencers” 
  • protecting our God Given and Constitutional right to own and use Semi-Automatic assault weapons with Uuuuuuge ammo clips
  • Minimizing Government Interference by stopping the expansion of Background Checks to buy Heat.

Gary Ramey, owner of Heat Maker Honor Defense, says the mood at last year’s SHOT Show, which stands for Shooting, Hunting and Outdoor Trade, was subdued. He’s expecting the same this year.

Ramey explains:  “There was no one to beat up. You didn’t have President Obama to put up in PowerPoint and say ‘He’s the best gun salesman, look what he’s doing to our country.  “Numbers are down,” he added. “You can’t deny it. 

The record shows that Heat and Ammo Sales hit record levels during the 8 years of the Obama Presidency.

President Obama, the Top Heat Salesman in History, History.

The National Shooting Sports Foundation’s SHOT Show has been held annually for more than four decades. This year more than 60,000 will attend the event.  There are 13 miles of aisles featuring products from more than 1,700 companies.  Participants will be wearing enough Cammo Clothing to outfit the army of a 3rd World Country.  Sarkes wonders what the Founding Fathers would have done differently if they had a crystal ball and could see the SHOT Show.  Alas, we will never know.  

What’s new in Packing Heat?  Go to the SHOT Show in Las Vegas

The Orange Snipper’s campaign was bolstered by $30 million donation from the NRA and when the Golden Gunman took office, the industry had hoped that a bevy of gun rights legislation would be enacted. The Orange Marksman’s administration quickly nixed an Obama-imposed rule that made it more difficult for disabled people to purchase and possess firearms.

The NRA supports the Disabled Packing Semi-Automatic Assault Weapons.

Alas, the euphoria did not last long.  In addition to plummeting Heat Sales and the lack of movement of the NRA’s Political Agenda, the NRA is having Uuuuuuuuge financial difficulties.  The NRA said it may no longer be able to produce its magazines, run its video streaming service, donate to Republican campaigns, or hold rallies.  The NRA blames Liberal New York Governor Andrew Cuomo for enacting discriminating legislation Targeted (pun intended) at putting the NRA out of business. 

Sarkes does not only report on issues, but also offers solutions.  If the NRA, Gunmakers, and 2nd Amendment Zealots are really interested in returning Heat Sales to the levels of their Glory days, they need to convince the Orange Triggerman to hire President Obama as his “Gun Czar”.  While the Golden Sharpshooter will be criticized by Ann Coulter, Steve Bannon, Sean O’Hannity, and Rush Limbaugh, Heat Sales will Soar, Soar.  

Gun Sales will Soar under new Gun Czar Obama

Black Face is a No No Today

Executive Summary:

– Michael Ertel, the newly appointed Florida Secretary of State, has resigned after photos emerged of him posing as a Hurricane Katrina victim in blackface.

– Michael Ertel is White

Photos of Michael Ertel in Black Face that were obtained by the Tallahassee Democrat were shown to Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. Shortly after, Michael Ertel got the Old Heave Ho. Michael Ertel is White.

Michael Ertel, a White Man, got the Old Heave Ho for Black Face.

To avoid confusion, Sarkes must point out that this story is about White Man Michael Ertel, not the famous Actor Steve Urkel, who is Black.

Actor Steve Urkel is Black.

The photos of White Man Ertel in Black Face were taken in 2005, two months after Hurricane Katrina devastated New Orleans. White Man Ertel dressed up in blackface, red lipstick, earrings, a New Orleans Saints bandanna, and falsies under a purple T-shirt that had “Katrina Victim” written on it.

White Man Ertel in Black Face.

More White Man Ertel in Black Face.

Sarkes tips his hat to White Man Ertel who manned up when questioned about these pictures. Most Old White Men accused of P-Grabbing, financial crimes, or doing / saying stupid things usually say: “I am innocent, this was a which hunt, I was misinterpreted, this was taken out of context, etc, etc.” Ertel simply said: “There’s nothing I can say”. Bravo to you Michael Ertel.

The Black Face Photos are the sole blemish on a seemingly spotless public career for Ertel, highlighted by a record of increasing Florida Voter Registration and making the elections office more accessible to Minorities. Ironically, the City of Longwood, Florida gave Michael their Martin Luther King Jr. award for registering voters.

Erkel earned the prestigious MLK Award.

When asked for Comment:

Actor Steve Urkel said: “Why do you keep asking me about this Michael Ertel. We are not related, he is White, I am Black. When Ertel puts on Black Face he doesn’t look Black. I should know, I’m Black”.

Steve Urkel is confused.

Congressman Steve King, R-Iowa, said: “Mixing cultures will not lead to a higher quality of life but a lower one. White nationalist, white supremacist, Black Face, — how did that language become offensive? First of all, I think you have to be White to do Black Face. Black Face must be a derogatory today, why? But today, you dress up in Black Face and they imply you are a racist.”

Congressman Steve King clears this all up.

The Orange Commander in Tweets Tweeted:

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 1 @ 3:56AM
This is another Witch Hunt by the Liberal Media to take down another Great American, Michael Ertel. The Tallahassee Democrat is a Failed Paper, their ratings are down. They are doing this to increase ratings, it won’t work!!!!!

The Orange Commander in Tweets supports Michael Ertel, the White one.

The Orange Commander in Tweet continued:

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 1 @ 4:17AM
What’s the Big Deal in coloring your face. Take Sarkes, he is a White Guy but looks Brown, he must be coloring his face, no one says anything. Heck, on occasion, sometimes I look Orange. SO WHAT!!!

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 1 @ 5:03AM
This PC stuff is out of control. The Witch Hunt attack on Michael Ertel was Rigged, Beleaguered, Cowardly, Evil, Crooked, Garbage Journalism, Covfefe. What’s next, purging ALL record of Great Entertainers like Al Jolsen???!!!

White Man Al Jolsen in Black Face.

Your’e Fired!!

Executive Summary:

– The Orange Chetto is clamping down on Illegal Immigration at our Southern Border
– And, even at his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs

The Orange Slurrpee is no hypocrite. The Gold Finger is fighting Congress to build a Great Beautiful Wall to protect us from the Illegal Mexican Rapists, Drug Attics, and Gangs that are invading our southern border every day. The Orange Julius is not stopping there. At his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs, the Golden Arches is purging any illegal employees that have invaded his properties.

The Orange Duffer has already set a record for most Golf Rounds played while serving as an American President….and in only 2 years!

A dozen immigrant workers at Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County, NY, were fired this month even though Trump Golf Club Managers had known about their legal status for years.

The Manager at the Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County called a dozen immigrant workers into a room and fired them, one by one. A Confidential Source told Sarkes that these firings were taped for a possible new TV Series: “The Immigrant Apprentice”. Each Immigrant was given those now famous words – “YOUR’E FIRED!”

The Golden Globe single handily saved NBC from Bankruptcy with the Greatest Show in TV History, The Apprentice.

Most of the Illegals who invaded the Trump Golf Club had worked there for over 10 years. This is like those Russian Sleeper Cells that invaded the US in the FX TV series “The Americans”. Sarkes Highly recommends you watch the 6 seasons of “The Americans” now showing on Amazon Prime.

But Sarkes digresses, back on point.

The Lawyer for the Illegal Invaders said that Trump Managers knew they had submitted phony documents but looked the other way. This is obviously Fake News and Alternative Facts. Our Commander in Tweets would never engage in any illegal activities. This is another Witch Hunt.

The Orange Traffic Cone has been the victim of countless Witch Hunts.

The heir to the Trump Throne, Eric Trump, depicted the firings to the Post as a normal course of business. “We are making a broad effort to identify any employee who has given false and fraudulent documents to unlawfully gain employment,” he said. “Where identified, any individual will be terminated immediately.”

Eric Trump added: “the system is broken.” Sarkes agrees, it took the Trump Empire over 10 years to seek and purge the Illegal Invaders working at their Trump International Hotels and Golf Courses. Hmmmmmmmmm

Hmmmmmm, Sarkes always wondered why we focus on the Illegal Invaders who are taking our American jobs and never mention the American Employers who hire the Illegal Invaders. Are the Illegal Invaders smarter than the American Employers?

FIRED, Carlos Lopez fired after 12 years working the grounds at Trump National Golf Club

FIRED, Maria Gonzales fired after 10 years working at the Trump International Hotel

Government Serfs, Let Them Eat Cake

Executive Summary:

– The Furlough of Government Employees just ended.…at least for 3 weeks.
– Senior Leaders and Advisers of the Trump Administration are empathetic.

Even though Senior Leaders and Advisers to King Donald I are Billionaires and Millionaires, they are sympathetic to the plight of furloughed Government workers, their Serfs if you will. The Orange Oligarch and his team, which includes the wealthiest Cabinet ever assembled, deliver a full dose of empathy for those Furloughed Government Serfs who live pay check to paycheck. The Orange Lord has assembled a Strong Leadership Team.

These Government Serfs work at the Agriculture Department

The sage advise provided by the Golden Exalted Leader and Senior Staff:

Billionaire Commerce Secretary Wilber Ross questioned why cash-poor Serfs were using food banks instead of taking out loans. “Well, I know they are, and I don’t really quite understand why”. Billionaire Ross provide sage advise for the Government Serf: “The obligations that they would undertake, say borrowing from a bank or a credit union, are, in effect, federally guaranteed. So the 30 days of pay that some people will be out … there’s no real reason why they shouldn’t be able to get a loan against it.”

Billionaire Commerce Secretary Wilber Ross encourages Furloughed Government Serfs to get Loans instead of going to Soup Kitchens and Food Banks.

White House Economic Adviser Millionaire Kevin Hassett said furloughed Serfs who are not getting paid during the government shutdown are “better off” because they didn’t have to use vacation days. Hassett provided a logical analysis: “Huge share of government workers were going to take vacation days, say between Christmas and New Year’s. And then we have a shutdown and so they can’t go to work, and so then they have the vacation but they don’t have to use their vacation days”. Finally, Hassett argues: “And then they come back and then they get their back pay, in some sense they’re better off”.

Economic Adviser Kevin Hassett says Furloughed Government Serfs have a Free Vacation and they are better off not working.

Reelection Campaign Adviser and Donald Trump’s Daughter-in-Law Millionaire Lara Trump had a message for the furloughed Serfs and Serfs working without pay: It will be worth it. Like a mother comforting her suffering children, Lara tells Furloughed Government Serfs: “Listen, it’s not fair to you, and we all get this, but this is so much bigger than any one person. It’s a little bit of pain, but it’s going to be for the future of our country.” Lara concludes: “Future Americans will be grateful for the shutdown. Their children and their grandchildren will thank them for their sacrifice right now.”

Campaign Adviser Lara Trump tells Furloughed Government Serfs that a little pain is good for the country. Lara was poor once and had to wear Genes with holes.

The Orange Billionaire also weighed in on the plight of the Furloughed Government Serf:

“Many furloughed government workers told me they’re fine with not getting paid as long as I secures additional funding for a border wall”.
“Most of the people not getting paid are Democrats.”
“Workers simply need to make adjustments.”
“I love them. I respect them. I really appreciate the great job they’re doing.”
“Banks and Grocery stores will work along with federal employees because they know the people.”

Now that’s Strong Leadership in these trying times. The Orange Monarch just may be Right when he declares that he has accomplished more in 2 years than any other President in History, History.

President Trump is providing Strong Leadership during the Government Shutdown

US Ambassador to France Millionaire Marie Antoinette believes that the Furloughed Government Serf will be fine. Her advise: “Let Them Eat Cake”.

Marie Antoinette believes that Furloughed Government Serfs will be fine just eating Cake.

A Government Serf enjoying his cake.

Another Senseless Mass Shooting

Executive Summary:

– Sarkes uses his newly created Mass Shooting Standard Form.

– This time, a Bank in Sebring, FL. Sebring is 99 miles north of Sarkeses hometown of Bonita Springs, FL…….too close for comfort.

Another Mass Murder by a White Man Packing Heat has happened. In this case, the Mass Murder was in (Fill in the Location) SEBRING, FL.

The Mass Murder happened at a (Fill in the venue, example: school, mall, church, concert) SUNTRUST BANK.

(Fill in the number of innocent people killed) ONLY 5 INNOCENT PEOPLE WERE MURDERED THIS TIME.

The Mass Murderer, angry White Man (Fill in the Murders Name and other details) 21 YEAR OLD ZEPHAN XAVER, HATED PEOPLE.

Angry White Man Mass Murderer Zephan Xaver.

The Angry White Man Mass Murderer (Select one: killed himself, was killed by Police, was Captured by Police, Surrendered to Police) SURRENDERED TO POLICE.

Shortly after the Mass Murder:
– A spokesman for the NRA said: “Guns don’t kill People, People kill People.”
– President Trump, the Orange Rifleman, said: “If there was an Armed Guard in the (BANK), the results would have been far better.”
– The President of the NRA said: “The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”
– A Conservative Friend of Sarkes said: “These Mass Murders with Semi-Automatic weapons are just the price of our Freedom”
– Countless Politicians said: “Our Thoughts and Prayers are with the victims of this shooting and their families, Thoughts and Prayers.”
– Another Conservative Friend of Sarkes said: “Mass Shooters go to Gun Free Zones, what do you expect”.

That’s if for this latest Mass Murder by an Angry White Man Packing Heat. Sarkeses use of the Standard Form should make reporting the next Mass Murder much easier.

Young Cracker in Training

Executive Summary:

– A Cracker Family was pulled over by Tallahassee Police
– A Cracker Toddler walks over to police with hands up

Sarkes thanks Canadian neighbor Dennis Parras for this story that has gone viral. You see, Dennis, a Canadian, lives in the same gated community as Sarkes and is insulated from the Florida Cracker. As such, Sarkes had to provide a personal, detailed, explanation of this story. Canadians do not understand the Cracker.

Sarkes asks you to see the viral video of this Cracker / Police confrontation by putting the following into your Browser: “Florida Toddler gets out of car with hands up”. This is evidence that Sarkes cannot make this stuff up.

The story:

A toddler in a pickup truck, the vehicle of choice for the Florida Cracker, that was stopped by police in Tallahassee complied with officers’ demands to exit the vehicle with her hands up, even though she was only two years old, two!

Video of the incident has gone viral. The video shows police officers pointing their guns at the truck and yelling at its occupants “Put your hands in the air” and “Get out of the truck.”

Lowly and Beholy, the toddler then follows the police officer’s instructions, walking over to police officers with her arms in the air. An officer meets the girl and picks her up.

The Infant Crackerette followed Policeman’s orders

More Infant Crackertte, what a good little girl, cute

Police Chief Michael DeLeo said officers had been responding to a report of a shoplifting incident in which a gun was seen. Tallahassee officers pulled over the suspect’s truck.

Among those inside the truck were 2 Crackers, a Crackerette, and two infant Crackers a 2-year-old girl and 1-year-old boy.

Unexpectedly, the two-year-old infant Crackerette climbed out of the truck and imitated her parents by walking to the officers with her hands raised.
The bodycam footage shows a police officer talking sweetly to the girl as she walked away from the pickup truck.

“Sweetie, you put your hands down. You’re fine. You’re fine. C’mon to Mommy,” the officer said. A pellet gun was found in the back seat of the vehicle where the toddler was sitting. It’s unknown at this time if the toddler Cracker owned the pellet gun.

Crackers Chad Bom and James McMullen were arrested on shoplifting charges.

Sarkes Analysis:

“Many People Say”, Sarkes, what a sad story. These Florida Cracker Criminals put their infant children in harms way by committing a crime and then exposing their infant children to armed police.

Sarkes warns, don’t jump to conclusions. Sarkes connects Dots were most cannot even see the Dots. Such is the case here.

Sarkes connects Dots when most cannot see the Dots

Dot 1: Crackers all Pack Heat, so even though the gun used in this crime was a Pellet Gun, store employees, and Police, had to assume that the Perp Crackers had real heat.

Dot 2: Florida Crackers are usually on the lower end of the Socio, Economic, and Intelligence Food Chains and are benchmarks for the expression “Crime does not pay” and are often caught red handed.

Dot 3: Yes, while Crackers Pack Heat and Drink heavily, they are not necessarily bad parents. Crackers, like normal people, love their children.

Sarkes Connects these Dots: You see, while on the surface, it looks like these Crackers were bad parents, putting their infant children in harms way, they are actually Benchmark Parents for other Florida Crackers and Crackerettes with infant Children.

You see, these Cracker Parents obviously had trained their infant daughter to get out of the car with “Hands Up” when facing heavily armed police. You see, its not an IF, but a WHEN…….some day, this infant Crackerette grow up and will run afoul with the law. WHEN that happens, she will be well prepared to put her “Hands Up”.

A Florida Cracker, Hands Up

A Florida Crackerette, Hands Up

No, Sarkes cannot make this stuff up.

Sarkes is running for President in 2020

Executive Summary:

– Today, Monday, January 21, Sarkes is in WDC, The Swamp, visiting granddaughter Baby Adds
– In this appropriate setting, Sarkes hereby officially announces that he will run for President in 2020

Well, Sarkes really tried to avoid this but has no choice. Sarkes declares that our current government is not working and wholesale changes are needed. Our House and Senate, Both Dems and GOPs, have paralyzed our government and the Giant Orange Earth Brain is ruling only for his Base; uneducated, underemployed, rural, white folk. It is now time for change.

Sarkes cannot do this alone. Sarkes is calling for:
– Americans MUST vote out ALL incumbents in the House and Senate in 2020
– Americans MUST vote for Sarkes for President in 2020

“Many People Say” Sarkes, you are on record that since you have retired from Boeing, you want to be a JAFO (Just Another F – – – ing Observer). Isn’t running for President anything but being a JAFO?

Sarkes Responds: While it’s true that Sarkes wants to be a JAFO in retirement, he is putting those plans on hold for the good of the county. In fact, Sarkes won the coveted Leadership Magazine’s 2018 Man of the Year Award.

Processed with MOLDIV

“Many People Say” Sarkes, its about time, but what is your Platform?

Sarkes Responds: Sarkes is running as an Independent on the Sarkes Independent Party. Sarkes will self impose a term limit. Sarkes will serve only 1 term as President.

The Platform of the Sarkes Independent Party is in development, but there are 2 Planks already established.

Sarkes Independent Party Plank 1 – Organization

Sarkes WILL NOT have a Cabinet. Rather, Sarkes will have a small cadre of Generals which will create The Sarkes Tribunal. Sarkes IS NOT smarter than the Generals. In fact, there are a bevy of Generals available to serve on Sarkeses Tribunal now that the Orange Commandant has given them all the Old Heave Ho.

Sarkeses Tribunal, all Generals

No Government offices / departments (State, Defense, etc) people will be eliminated. Rather, the Government offices / departments will be delegated authority to serve the people of the US. Over site of these Government offices / departments will be provided by The Sarkes Tribunal.

Sarkes may need to start his Presidential term with a Sarkes Tribunal consisting of all Old White Male Generals, but Sarkes is committed to finding some Generals who are Women, Black, Brown, Yellow, and Red…………..surely some of these Generals exist………….don’t they?

Sarkes Independent Party Plank 2 – Build The Wall

Sarkes will build a Wall on BOTH our Southern and Northern Border. The Sarkes Wall will be a Big UGLY Wall and will cover the entire Southern and Northern borders.

The Sarkes Big UGLY Wall will cost the US Tax Payers little to NO tax dollars. “Many People Say”, Sarkes, are you on Meth? How can you build a Border wall that will not be paid by the Taxpayers.

Simple, the Sarkes Big UGLY Wall will be built entirely of used tires; car tires, truck tires, tractor tires, any and all tires.

You see, over 250 MILLION used tires must be recycled every year in the US. Sarkeses friend and neighbor, Jim Helgeson, Owner and CEO of Riley Park Tires in Greenfield, IN, is a Tire Expert, and tells Sarkes that his company pays between $2.00 and $35.00 for each tire, depending on the size of the tire, to recycle. Of course, this cost is transferred to the consumer as a “Disposal Fee”.

Tire Dealers all across America pay MILLIONS, MILLIONS, to recycle old Tires

Under Sarkeses plan, instead of paying between $2.00 and $35.00 per tire to recycle, Tire companies all over America will send their used tires to the Southern and Northern Borders to build the Sarkes Big Ugly Wall.

The Liberal Press Fake News Media have challenged Sarkes about his plan to build the Sarkes Big Ugly Wall out of used tires. Here are their questions:

Question: Sarkes, you said the Sarkes Big Ugly Wall will not cost the Taxpayers anything, how can that be?

Sarkes Answers: The used tires will be transported to the Southern and Northern Borders by US Military Transport Trucks. You see, the Military is already funded and properly equipped. And, the Navy CB’s will build the Wall. Tire Dealers all over America will save Billions of Dollars in recycle costs, Billions, and these savings will be TRICKLED DOWN to consumers. This is a Win, Win, Win.

The US Military has plenty of Trucks to move the Tires

Question: But Sarkes, won’t a tire wall be easy to breech?

Sarkes Answers: Quite the opposite, the Sarkes Big Ugly Wall be designed to make it virtually impossible breech. The tires will be strategically piled so the Evil Doer who is invading our country will either give up or fall thru to the bottom of the tire pile. If the Evil Doer falls thru to the bottom of the tire wall, they will be extracted and sent back to their homeland.

A Prototype of the Sarkes Big Ugly Wall made of Used Tires

Question: Sarkes, you said that the Big Ugly Wall will be “virtually” impossible to breech. What will Customs & Border Protection do if someone does happen to breech the wall?

Sarkes Answers: Sarkes, a benevolent Leader, is so confident that his Big Ugly Wall of tires will NOT be breeched, that he will give any illegal, without a criminal record, IMMEDIATE Citizenship and a great paying job at a Roofing Company or Landscaper if they breech the Big Ugly Wall.

Sarkes offers immediate citizenship and a job to any who breech the Big Ugly wall

Last Question: Sarkes, will the Big Ugly Wall be able to protect against the Caravans of Illegals that we have recently experienced.

Sarkes Answers: Now Sarkes knows that this will be controversial, but if America is invaded by a Caravan of Illegals, our Customs & Border Protection officers will set that section of the Big Ugly Tire Wall on fire. Have you ever seen a Tire fire? This will repel and turn around the Caravan. The Sarkes Big Ugly Wall can then be easily repaired.

Caravans of Illegals will not be able to breech the Big Ugly Wall

The Big Ugly Wall can be lit to repel Caravans of Illegals

More Planks of the Sarkes Independent Party will be published when established.

Until then, spread the word. Sarkes for President in 2020. Help Sarkes save America.