– Sarkes uses his newly created Mass Shooting Standard Form.
– This time, a Bank in Sebring, FL. Sebring is 99 miles north of Sarkeses hometown of Bonita Springs, FL…….too close for comfort.
Another Mass Murder by a White Man Packing Heat has happened. In this case, the Mass Murder was in (Fill in the Location) SEBRING, FL.
The Mass Murder happened at a (Fill in the venue, example: school, mall, church, concert) SUNTRUST BANK.
(Fill in the number of innocent people killed) ONLY 5 INNOCENT PEOPLE WERE MURDERED THIS TIME.
The Mass Murderer, angry White Man (Fill in the Murders Name and other details) 21 YEAR OLD ZEPHAN XAVER, HATED PEOPLE.
The Angry White Man Mass Murderer (Select one: killed himself, was killed by Police, was Captured by Police, Surrendered to Police) SURRENDERED TO POLICE.
Shortly after the Mass Murder:
– A spokesman for the NRA said: “Guns don’t kill People, People kill People.”
– President Trump, the Orange Rifleman, said: “If there was an Armed Guard in the (BANK), the results would have been far better.”
– The President of the NRA said: “The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”
– A Conservative Friend of Sarkes said: “These Mass Murders with Semi-Automatic weapons are just the price of our Freedom”
– Countless Politicians said: “Our Thoughts and Prayers are with the victims of this shooting and their families, Thoughts and Prayers.”
– Another Conservative Friend of Sarkes said: “Mass Shooters go to Gun Free Zones, what do you expect”.
That’s if for this latest Mass Murder by an Angry White Man Packing Heat. Sarkeses use of the Standard Form should make reporting the next Mass Murder much easier.
– Employees at Wisconsin company received Guns as Christmas gifts
– Huh, uh, what, are you kidding me, serious?, whatever
Thanks to Sarkes Corner Contributor and sister Cindy Mamelian for this unique story of packing heat out of Wisconsin.
Sarkes doesn’t know much about Wisconsin. What does Sarkes know? Wisconsin is known for: Cheese Curd, Cheese Heads, Sargento Cheese, Culvers Fast Food Restaurant, and the Green Bay Packers.
Sarkes apparently did not know that Wisconsin is home to an NRA Award Winning company, BenShot LLC. BenShot LLC is the NRA’s 2018 Company of the Year The business is best known for its designer glasses featuring beer, whisky, and shot glasses with BULLETS embedded into the glass.
Employees at a glass-making firm in Wisconsin say they are grateful for the guns they received as Christmas gifts from the company. Instead of a cash bonus, each employee at BenShot LLC was given a brand new gun of their choice. Now that’s a gift that keeps on giving.
BenShot LLC’s mission is to create unique glassware designs. The “Bulletproof” glass products started as a father and son project and developed into a family business. Each handcrafted glass or decanter comes with an embedded Copper Bullet.
With each delivery, BenShot provides cleaning instructions: “Glasses should be hand-washed. Dishwashers may tarnish the copper bullet.”
A media relations employee at BenShot LLC is, Chelsea Priest, is grateful for the gift. “For him (the Owner) to stand for something and for the company to stand for keeping us safe is really awesome for them to do that.”
Huh, uh, what, are you kidding me, serious?, whatever
A spokesman for the NRA said: “What America needs is more companies like BenShot. This company understands the importance of the 2nd Amendment and should be considered a benchmark for all American companies big and small”
It’s unknown if the Orange Rifleman will make a campaign rally trip to the BenShot factory. If he does, Sarkes hopes that Michael, the Black Guy”, who is placed behind the Golden MLK at his rallies, shows up. Michel “the Black Guy” has been conspicuous by his absence at recent Trump rallies.
– With the continuous rash of Mass Murders by Angry White Men using Semi-Automatic Weapons, Sarkes has created a Standard Form that can be used when the next Mass Murder occurs. And make no mistake, there will be a next time, and a next time and a next time ……….. This Standard Form will save Sarkes time and angst, Sarkes will simply Fill in the Blanks.
Another Mass Murder by a White Man using a Semi-Automatic weapon has happened. In this case, the Mass Murder was in (Fill in the Location)Pittsburgh, PA.
The Mass Murder happened at a (Fill in the venue, example: school, mall, church, concert)Synagogue.
(Fill in the number of innocent people killed)11 people were murdered and 6 were injured.
The Mass Murderer, angry White Man (Fill in the Murders Name and other details)Robert Bowers, hated Jews and blamed the Jews for the recent invasion of illegal Mexicans.
The Mass Murderer used (Identify the weapon used)a Semi-Automatic AR-15, the weapon of choice for Angry Mass Murdering White Men, and 3 powerful pistols.
The Angry White Man Mass Murderer (Select one: killed himself, was killed by Police, was Captured by Police)was captured by Police.
Shortly after the Mass Murder:
A spokesman for the NRA said: “Guns don’t kill People, People kill People.”
President Trump, the Orange Rifleman, said: “If there was an Armed Guard in the Synagogue, the results would have been far better.”
The President of the NRA said: “The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”
A Conservative Friend of Sarkes said: “These Mass Murders with Semi-Automatic weapons are just the price of our Freedom”
Countless Politicians said: “Our Thoughts and Prayers are with the victims of this shooting and their families, Thoughts and Prayers.”
That’s if for this latest Mass Murder by an Angry White Man using a Semi-Automatic Weapon. Sarkeses use of the Standard Form should make reporting the next Mass Murder much easier.
– The NRA sues Florida over gun control bill, huh?
– More than 450 people in Florida ordered to give up guns under the new law
Thanks to Sarkes Corner contributor and sister Cindy Mamelian who specializes in stories about Florida Crackers and Packing Heat.
Florida Governor Tricky Ricky Scott signed a Florida bill into law that raises the minimum age for buying rifles and allows some school employees to be armed.
The Risk Protection Order was signed by the Trickster just three weeks after a gunman killed 17 people at Stoneman Douglas and aims to temporarily remove weapons from gun owners who have been deemed by a judge to possibly be a threat to themselves or others.
Roughly 200 firearms have been confiscated in the state since the law was enacted along with 30,000 rounds of ammunition.
The first gun seizure under the law occurred when Florida authorities confiscated an AR-15 semiautomatic rifle from an Army veteran. Jerron Smith’s gun was seized when he refused to surrender it voluntarily. Broward County Sheriff’s officers also seized a .22 caliber rifle he owned, hundreds of rounds of ammunition, a bump stock and numerous other weapon-related items.
In addition to confiscating guns, the law also raised the age to buy a rifle to 21 and established a three-day waiting period on gun purchases.
The NRA is furious over this action by the Gunshine State to infringe on the God Given 2nd Amendment Rights of all Great Americans to bear arms. Florida once was the NRA’s Benchmark for laws protecting it citizens right to bear arms including it’s now famous “Stand Your Ground” law.
As Florida moves to enact Gun Control laws in the wake of the senseless murder of scores of it’s citizens with semi automatic heat, Sarkes old home state, Missouri, the Shoot Me State, is poised to become the new Benchmark State for the NRA.
– A Texas company is cleared to put 3D-printed gun designs online
– Sarkes warns, we are on the edge of that slippery slope
Somewhere in the Great Beyond, our Founding Fathers are sitting around a table pondering the mistake they made when crafting the 2nd Amendment which states: “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”
You see, in 1789, the year of our Constitution, common Heat included Muskets and Flintlock Pistols. These weapons had a one-round magazine capacity and could fire about 2 rounds per MINUTE in the hands of the most skilled shooter.
Thanks to our Supreme Court and the NRA, America has evolved from Muskets to AR-15’s with 30 Round Magazines. An AR-15 can shoot over 100 rounds per MINUTE, 100 rounds!
And now, we are in the early stages of producing Heat made on a 3D Printer. 3D-printed guns are made of a hard plastic and are simple to assemble, easy to conceal, and tough to trace.
After spending years fighting the federal government for the right to do so, a Texas company, Defense Distributed, was given the green light to post blueprints online showing people how to make 3D-printed guns from the comfort of their home. This was made possible due to the gun-friendly environment created by the Orange Rifleman.
Gun SAFETY advocates, and some law enforcement officials, are appalled. They are worried that this is exactly what criminals and terrorists want: guns that can’t be flagged by metal detectors, don’t have serial numbers to trace, and don’t require the usual background checks.
The argument FOR 3D-printed Heat is that these weapons will NOT be desired by criminals since the 3D-printers needed are expensive and the firearms they produce aren’t very durable.
Larry Keane, executive director of the National Shooting Sports Foundation, which represents gun manufacturers states: “If you’re a Gang Banger in L.A., are you going to go out and spend tens of thousands of dollars to buy a printer to print a gun that doesn’t work very well or are you just going to steal one. Criminals can obviously go out and steal guns or even manufacture quote-unquote real guns, not 3D printed”. Larry Keane is another Rich, Old, White Guy, so he must know what he is talking about.
Duh, oh, uh, huh, what, oh, my, huh.
Sarkes, a recovering Liberal, is having some challenges on the Orange Brick road to becoming a card carrying Conservative. This gun stuff is a Uuuuuuge pothole for Sarkes. Don’t the 2nd Amendment, NRA Lemmings understand that the risk from 3D-printed Heat is NOT the LA Gang Banger, rather the well funded, home grown White Supremacist terrorist, or the well funded, stereotypical Muslim terrorist?
Load and Lock America, Load and Lock your 3D-printed Heat.
– A Florida White Cracker shot and killed a Black Man during parking lot dispute
– Is this George Zimmerman killing Trayvon Martin revisited?
Sarkes thanks Sarkes Corner Contributor David “Shep” Schepers on this story from Florida, the Gunshine State.
WARNING WARNING WARNING….The Pictures at the end of this article are real and may be disturbing to some readers of Sarkes Corner…….WARNING WARNING WARNING
A deadly shooting at a convenience store in Clearwater, Florida started from an argument over a parking spot.
Michael Drejka, a White, Cracker, confronted a woman, Britany Jacobs, who parked in an Handicap parking space outside a grocery store. Cracker Drejka confronted Jacobs because she did not have a Handicap parking permit.
The woman’s boyfriend, Markeis McGlockton, a Black Man, was inside the store to buy his 5-year-old son a candy bar. Black Man McGlockton exited the store to defend his girlfriend and shoved Cracker Drejka to the ground.
Cracker Drejka responded by taking out a pistol and shooting Black Man McGlockton in the chest. Black Man McGlockton, injured, ran back into the store. His son was standing at the front door, watching the entire incident. Black Man McGlockton was pronounced dead at a local hospital.
Cracker Drejka has a legal concealed weapon permit holder and will not be charged because the incident falls under the Gunshine state’s Stand Your Ground law. Stand Your Ground allows someone to use deadly force if they believe it necessary to prevent death or great bodily harm.
Pinellas County Sheriff Bob Gualtieri said: “He (Cracker Drejka) told deputies that he had to shoot to defend himself. Those are the facts and that’s the law. No matter how you slice it or dice it that was a violent push to the ground.”
Huh, uh, oh, huh?……????
Black Man McGlockton’s girl friend Jacobs said that Drejka was getting away with murder. “How is this ‘Stand Your Ground’ law?” she asked. “It’s not! Markeis pushed him, how does that justify a bullet?”
This is not the first time that Cracker Drejka has instigated an argument over a Handicap Parking spot. Rick Kelly said that two months ago he was at the same store and parked in the same handicapped spot. He said he saw Drejka walking around his vehicle checking to see if he had a Handicap Parking permit, which he didn’t.
Kelly said that during the ensuing argument Drejka threatened to shoot him. Cracker Kelly said: ”It’s a repeat, It happened to me the first time. The second time it’s happening, someone’s life got taken. He provoked that.”
Pinellas County Sheriff Bob Gualtieri continued: “What’s relevant is not whether this guy’s a good guy, nice guy, or whether he’s a jerk, or whether he’s a thorn in people’s side and what he’s done, whether it’s three weeks ago, three months ago or three years ago. What’s relevant and the only thing we can look at here is was he in fear of further bodily harm”.
Huh, uh, oh, huh?……????
Sarkes connects the DOTs as only he can:
George Zimmerman, a White man, Neighborhood Watch, shoots and Kills a Black Man Trayvon Martin, who had just bought candy from a convenience store, and is free because to the Gunshine State’s Stand Your Ground Law.
Michael Drejka, a White man, Parking Lot Watch, shoots and Kills a Black Man Markeis McGlockton, who had just bought candy from a convenience store, and is free because to the Gunshine State’s Stand Your Ground Law.
Huh, uh, oh, huh?……????
Sarkes, a Constitutional Scholar, has failed to find a logical correlation between the 2nd Amendment and the Gunshine State’s Stand Your Ground Law.
Sarkes has failed to understand why his Florida neighbors Pack Concealed Heat.
Sarkes has failed to understand why anyone must die over a parking space.
– An Arizona woman, 92, killed her son who wanted to put her in a Nursing Home
– This story hits too close to home for Sarkes
This story was provided by Sarkes Corner St. Louis Bureau Chief and sister Cindy Mamelian. When Sarkes first read this story, something seemed strange. You see, Cindy normally submits stories to Sarkes Corner about Florida Crackers doing stupid things that Florida Crackers usually do.
But this story was different. A 92 year-old woman in Arizona shot and killed her son because she did not want to be sent to an assisted living facility.
Arizonian Anna Mae Blessing was charged with first degree murder, aggravated assault, and kidnapping after authorities found her 72 year old son dead Monday at their home in Fountain Hills in the Phoenix area.
Blessing hid TWO pistols in the pockets of her robe and shot her son several times in his bedroom. Her son’s girlfriend was also in the room and said she heard Blessing telling her son she was tired of the way he treated her.
Blessing then pointed the gun at her son’s girlfriend, who struggled with Blessing until she lost her grip of the gun. When Blessing pulled out a second pistol from her robe, her son’s girlfriend also knocked the 2nd Heat from her hands.
Only in a Bright Red State, like Arizona, can a 92 year old mother Pack Dual Heat, and then pop her 72 year old son. Sarkes, a Constitutional Scholar, can guarantee that our Founding Fathers never envisioned 92 year old Women Packing Heat. In fact, our Founding Fathers gave no rights to Women.
But something was still bothering Sarkes about this story. And then, an A – HA moment, the Light Bulb went on.
Sarkeses and Cindy’s mother, Alice Korkoian, will be 92 in September. For the past several years, Alice has been living in a great Independent Living Senior Center, River’s Edge. In the past year, Alice has had some health set backs and, while still able to live at River’s Edge, there may come a day when she may need to go into an Assisted Living home. If that day comes, Alice will go kicking and screaming.
Is Sarkes at Risk? Could Mother Alice be Packing Heat? Sarkes does not believe that mother Alice is Packing Heat. But she does live in Missouri, the Shoot Me State, where anyone, including Felon’s on Parole, can Pack Heat.
But just to be safe, when Sarkes goes to St. Louis to visit Alice, he will call ahead to River’s Edge Security and have them search Alices apartment for any Heat. One can never be too safe in the Shoot Me State.
– Indiana child fires handgun found in sofa at Ikea
Sarkes thanks Sarkes Corner Canadian Bureau Chief Dennis Parass for this story out of Indiana reported by Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC).
Just when Sarkes had thought he had reported on all derivatives of senseless accidental gun shootings; Infant on Infant, Infant on Parent, Dog on Owner, Cracker on Cracker, Cracker on Self, etc, another classification of senseless shooting surfaces…… Child on Sofa.
A six-year-old child in Indianapolis, Indiana, found a loaded handgun in a sofa at Ikea and fired it. The Heat had fallen into the cushions as a shopper sat down to test the sofa at the IKEA store in a suburb of Indianapolis.
Nobody was hurt in the incident, but the sofa was ruined beyond repair. No arrests have been made. Ikea said it had expressed “sincerest apologies” to the child’s family.
Police reported that the gun owner did not notice that he had dropped his Heat. A police spokesperson reported: ”He sat down and somehow or another the firearm became dislodged from this body and when he got up he didn’t realize that he was without it”. The owner continued shopping and only became aware he had lost his gun when he heard gunfire.
Sarkes analyzes this Child on Sofa shooting:
While the name of the child and Gun Owner have not been released, Sarkes knows with 1,000 percent confidence, that the Gun Owner is a Lard Ass. Who amongst us has not witnessed, while shopping at a furniture store, a Lard Ass trying to get up off a sofa after checking it out. It’s not a pretty site. Brutal.
In its statement, IKEA said the “safety and security of customers and co-workers is the top priority”. IKEA “has a no-weapon policy in our locations to prevent exactly these types of situations,” their statement continued. Are you kidding me, the IKEA no-weapon policy is no more a deterrent to Heat Packing Americans than their Swedish Meat Balls.
This story hits close to home for Sarkes. Sarkes has 3 great snowbird neighbors who live in Indianapolis; Rich C., Jim H. and Larry B. These Indiana neighbors could have easily been resting on an IKEA sofa while their wives were shopping IKEA, in harms way of a stray bullet fired by a Child Packing Heat.
Wait a second, what was Sarkes thinking, his Indianapolis Florida Snowbird neighbors would never be caught in an IKEA. IKEA is for students, Young people just starting, and the Poor, not Old Rich White Guys who can afford so much more.
Finally, The Orange Rifleman, does what he does best, he weighed in on Twitter:
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – June 27 @ 4:57AM
Another tragic shooting in an IKEA store in Indianapolis. My thoughts and prayers to any piece of furniture that may have been shot. This is not a gun issue, it is a negligence issue on IKEA. IKEA sofas are too hard to get up out of by most Americans who may be a bit overweight. Americans are overweight because our Economy is thriving, unemployment is the lowest ever, and there is enough food to go around for all Americans. America can thank me.
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – June 27 @ 5:28AM
IKEA will not get away with their gross negligence. Donald J. Trump hereby orders a 40% Tariff on all goods sold in IKEA stores. I will have the health department check the IKEA Swedish Meatballs. IKEA Swedish Meatballs are Phony, Fake, Low Rated, Fools…..give me a good old American Quarter Pounder with Cheese any day, now that’s what Makes America Great.
– The State of Florida has revoked 291 concealed weapons permits after an employee stopped reviewing background checks
– Florida Agriculture Commissioner Adam Putnam said his agency had a ‘deceitful’ employee.
Sarkes thanks Sarkes Corner Contributor and Sister Cindy Mamelian for this story out of Florida from CNN. Cindy, a frequent traveler to Florida, the Gunshine State, is always on the lookout for stories of the antics of Florida Crackers.
Florida, the Gunshine State, have over 1.5 MILLION citizens with Concealed Carry Permits, 1.5 MILLION! The overwhelming majority of these citizens are Crackers who are low on the Socio-Economic and Intelligence scales.
It is unknown how many Florida Crackers Pack Heat without bothering to apply for a Concealed Carry Permit.
To compound matters, Florida recently revoked almost 300 concealed weapons permits after discovering that a state employee failed to review criminal background checks on applicants because she couldn’t log into the computer system. So, instead of calling IT, the Florida State Clerk just issued the Concealed Carry Permits without conducting the required Background Checks. Some Florida State Government employees are not the sharpest knifes in the drawer.
As a result of computer problems, which lasted for more than a year, 291 people got concealed carry permits who should not have received them. That’s 291 Crackers who should not be Packing Heat.
Florida Commissioner Adam Putman, now a candidate for Governor to replace Tricky Ricky Scott, said: ”The former employee was both deceitful and negligent, and we immediately launched an investigation and implemented safeguards to ensure this never happens again.
There you have it. Travelers to Florida Beware. At any pubic venue, Restaurant, Shopping Malls, Ball Park, everywhere, the stranger next to you most likely is Packing Heat, and some number of these are Crackers who should have never been issued a Concealed Carry Permit.