The July 4th Celebration in Washington DC

Executive Summary:

  • Late Breaking News, Sarkes reports on a Meeting in the Oval Office
  • Sarkes reviles behind the scenes decisions 

In Late Breaking News, before heading to Europe with the Sarkes Corner Staff, Sarkes received an Emergency Call from his source in the White House, LEAKER.  At great risk, LEAKER said that he had a recording of a meeting in the Oval Office between the Orange Commander and Chief of Staff (Acting) Mick Mulvaney, discussing the 4th of July Celebration in DC.  

Sarkes provides the transcript of the meeting between the Orange King Pin and Mulvaney, Word for Word.  Sarkes reports, you decide.

Mick Mulvaney and the Orange Czar discussing the 2019 4th of July events in DC

Mick Mulvaney:  “Boss, there are a few things we need to discuss about the 4th of July Celebration tomorrow ….”

The Orange Commandant: (Interrupting) “Mick, this will be the GREATEST event in American History.  There is no other Military that comes close to ours.  We will put all of those other parades to shame.  Even my buds Vlads and Kim will not be able to compete.  I am a WINNER and will always be a WINNER.  There will be a record number of people in the National Mall, even more than my Inauguration!”

Mick Mulvaney:  “Ok Boss, but I need to go over a few things.  First, the Press and Democrats will be watching you closely.  They claim that you are using Tax Payer money for what will be a Political Rally for your 2020 Presidential Run.  You need to be careful about what you say …..”

The Orange Monarch: (Interrupting) “Mick, F – – k the Fake News Media and the Socialist Democrats, they are all a bunch of F – – king Idiots, Stone Cold Losers, Low IQ, Deranged Animals.  I will say what ever I want, you understad.  Let them try to charge my Campaign.  I will just ignore them, and if they sue we have the Supreme Court in our pocket.  F – – K THEM! What’s Next.

Mick Mulvaney: “Uh, oh, well, OK, I don’t have anything else”

The Orange Emperor:  “Well Mick, I have a few questions.  Have Sarah Sanders get a hold of my Sec Def Patrick Shanahan”

Mick Mulvaney:  “Uh Boss, Sarah Sanders resigned as of the end of June and Shanahan resigned a few weeks ago over some Domestic Violence issues.  Your new Press Secretary is Stephanie Grisham who will do double duty as Melania’s Press Secretary.  Your new Acting Sec Def is Mark Esper.”

Sarah Sanders will go down in history as the White House Press Secretary that held the fewest and shortest White House Press Briefings

Patrick Shanahan will be Completely Exonerated, Case Closed, Boeing Executives are guided by a strong Code of Ethics

Stephanie Grisham will make a great Press Secretary, while she is not Blonde, she does have Big Ta Tas and could work at Fox News 
Mark Esper is doing double duty as the Acting Sec Def and Secretary of the Army, no big deal, the Orange Commander does not need a Sec Def

The Orange Autocrat:  “Oh well, we don’t need a Press Secretary, I told Sarah not to hold any Press Conferences, make sure Stephanie gets the word.  And I don’t believe for a minute that Shanahan is guilty of Domestic Violence.  He told me he did not do that and I have no reason to doubt him.  After all, he was a Boeing Executive and they have a strict Code of Conduct.  That Sarkes guy was also a Boeing Executive and his Sarkes Corner is Fair and Balanced.  Oh well, get Esper in here immediately.  

Meeting is suspended and 30 minutes later Acting Sec Def Mark Esper arrives from the Pentagon.

Mark Esper:  “Sir, Mick said that  you had a few questions about the 4th of July activities tomorrow.”

The Orange King: “Mark, Mick tells me that you have scheduled a Fly Over with Air Force 1, the F-18 Blue Angels, and the F-22.  If anyone asks, you are using DOD Training Budget for these Flyovers, understand.  And, Air Force 1 and F-18 Blue Angels are great Boeing products that always come in ahead of schedule and under cost so give them the most Air time.  The Failed Lockheed Martin F-22 is BILLIONS over cost and YEARS behind Schedule.  Scratch the F-22 from the Flyover.”

Air Force 1 is a High Quality Boeing product that has been serving Presidents for Decades

The Blue Angels are High Quality Boeing F-18s and will never be replaced by the Failed Lockheed Martin F-35 or F-22

Mark Esper:  “Uh, oh, well, yes Sir, will do”

The Orange Royal Majesty:  “And Mark, I want those Abrams Tanks that are staged on the National Mall to roll toward the Podium when I talk, understand.”

Mark Esper:  “But sir, we can’t do that, the DC Mayor and Police have told us that the Abrams Tanks are not allowed on their streets due to the damage that will cause…..”

The Abrams Tank is the fastest, most powerful Tank in the World

The Orange Potentate:  (interrupting)  “Just what about I just told you don’t you understand, remember that I am your Boss and you take orders directly from me.  And F – – k that Failed DC Mayor Muriel Bowser, her name is Bowser because she has the face of the Dog.  What is DC going to do, send me a Bill, (laughing), I’ll just ignore that like I do everything else, now make it happen.

Mark Esper:  “Yes sir, whatever you say”

The Orange Premier:  “Now Mark, Mick Tells me that the stupid Baby Trump Ballon will be flying over the National Mall.  That is Totally Illegal, Evil, flown by Fools, Seriously Flawed, a Hit Job, Phony and TREASONOUS, TREASONOUS!  If they fly the Baby Trump Ballon I am ordering you to shoot is down, I don’t care what you use. Understand.”

The Baby Trump Ballon is Treasonous and will be shot down

The Orange Exalted Ruler:  “Mark, one last thing, I want our troops to Goose Step when they march toward me before I speak.  If Putins, Kims, Duartes, and Erderon’s troops can Goose Step our US troops should Goose Step higher and better.”

Mark Esper whispers to Mick Mulvaney: (whispering) “Mick, we do not have any troops lined up to march tomorrow, where did he get that idea.”

Mick Mulvaney whispers to Mark Esper: (whispering) “Mark, just shake your head and leave.”

US Troops do not Goose Step but can learn fast

The Orange Fuhrer:  “Ok Mick, that should do it.  Oh wait, has my Uniform been delivered?  While I am the fittest President EVER, I want to make sure that the Tailor did not screw up and made it too tight.”

Mick Mulvaney:  “Your Uniform was delivered, I’ll bring it right up.”

The Orange Admiral looks sharp in his Uniform.  He won’t be wearing military shoes due to his Bone Spurs

Trump and Sarkes, 2 Peas in a Pod?

Executive Summary:

  • Is it possible that the Orange Cantaloupe and Sarkes have enough in Common that they are 2 Peas in a Pod?

“Many People Say” Sarkes, you and the Orange Jumpsuit have so much in common that you are 2 Peas in a Pod.

At first, Sarkes was in Full Denial.  How could this be?  Sarkes, a Truth Machine, stepped away from this story and asked his Crack Sarkes Corner Investigative Team to investigate.

In a somber meeting at the Sarkes Corner Headquarters, the Harsh Facts were laid out for Sarkes by the Sarkes Corner Investigative Team:

1. Sarkes and the Orange Creamsicle were both Democrats before becoming Republicans. 

Both Sarkes and the Orange Donkey were Liberal Democrats who saw the light and became Conservative Republicans

2. Not only did Sarkes and the Orange Ameba switched to become Republicans, both became staunch Reagan Conservatives.

Sarkes and the Orange Orangutan are Ultra Conservatives, walking in the foot steps of the Great Conservative Ronald Reagan

3. The Orange Commander in Tweets and Sarkes did not serve in the Viet Nam War. The Orange Podiatrist had Bone Spurs and Sarkes had a High Draft Lottery Number (Young Subscribers to Sarkes Corner need to Google “Viet Nam Era Draft Lottery” for details).

To this day, the Orange Orthopedic suffers from Bone Spurs which are so painful that he cannot sleep, so he Tweets

Sarkeses Draft Lottery Number was 288 out of 365 so he was not drafted

4. The Orange Exalted Leader and Sarkes have both been the Victims of Investigations.  The Orange Goliath was victimized by Mueller and the 17 “Angry Democrats”.   Sarkes was investigated by the “16 Angry Sweeds” on the Nobel Committee for Plagiarism while writing the Award Winning Sarkes Corner.  Both Investigations were Phony, a Hoax, Hit Job, Witch Hunt, Failed Takedown, Treasonous, and a Thousand Stabs, a Thousand.

The Orange Victim was the target of 17 Angry Democrats and was COMPLETELY EXONERATED!

Sarkes was falsely accused by the 16 Angry Sweeds on the Nobel Committee, all of whom are White, investigating Sarkes, a Brown Man

5. Both Sarkes and the Orange Flag Stick love to play Golf.  The Orange Divot uses the USGA Rules of Golf and Cheats to get his Low Handicap.  Sarkes uses the Eric Pedersen Rules of Golf but still has a High Handicap.

While the Orange Sand Trap has the skill, Bone Spurs have kept the Orange Bogey from becoming a Pro Golfer

6.  Both Sarkes and the Orange Tangerine are Colored.  Trump is Orange and Sarkes is a Brown Man.  Being people of Color has not stopped the Orange Zest or Sarkes from accomplishing great things.

The Orange Bully Making America Great Again one Tweeter at a Time

Brown Sarkes Making America Great Again one Sarkes Corner at a Time

7. Both the Orange Einstein and Sarkes are Extremely STABLE GENIUSES.  The Orange Monarchs Lackeys are often paraded in front of the Fox News Cameras to give testimony on the Genius of the Orange Intellect.  On the other hand, Sarkeses Genius is demonstrated in Sarkes Corner.  

Trump, Sarkes and Einstein are 3 Peas in a Stable Genius Pod, Trump and Einstein have similar Hair Styles

The Orange Merchandiser has added a ‘Stable Genius” line of clothes in his Trump Enterprises Catalog 

8. The Orange Pacifier and Sarkes are always Cool and Calm.  At a recent Sarkes Corner Staff Meeting, Sarkes took a poll of the Sarkes Corner staff and was told:

  • “Sarkes, You were very Calm, and you laid out the case”
  • “You are Calm, very Calm”
  • “You are always Calm”
  • “I don’t know how you stay so Calm”
The Orange Pacifier is always Calm, Very Calm, just ask him

Sarkes, a perennial finalist for the Nobel Prize in Mathematics, can make an inference from only 1 Data Point.  Here, the Sarkes Corner Staff has provided 8 Data Points, 8!,  that the Orange Tabby and Sarkes have much in common.  Now that’s powerful, indisputable Data.

Well, there you have it, the Harsh Truth, Proof Positive that the Orange Crush and Sarkes are indeed, 2 Peas in a Pod.

Sarkes and the Orange Nehi, 2 Peas in a Pod

Does Trump Cheat at Golf?

Executive Summary:

  • Rick Reilly has written a book about how the Orange Duffer Cheats at Golf
  • Is this just another Vicious Attack, Hoax, Witch Hunt, Hit Job, Illegal Take Down, and Treasonous attack against the Orange Caddie? 
  • There are a number of different Rules of Golf, so what seems like Cheating may not be.  At Spring Run, some of us use the Pedersen Alternate Rules of Golf

The Orange Flag Stick is under constant Siege by the Liberal Press and Demon Democrats.  The latest assault against the Orange Shanker is from Sports Writer, Rick Reilly.  While both are famous Writers, do not mistake Rick Reilly for Bill Reilly.

Rick Reilly is leading the latest vicious attack on the Orange Ace

Bill Reilly was the Fox News Cash Cow but got the Old Heave Ho for P-Grabbing

Rick Reilly’s new book; COMMANDER IN CHEAT, documents that the Orange Flag Stick is a Serial Cheater when he plays Golf.  In addition to his Sports books, Reilly is best known for his work on ESPN and ABC Sports.  With his vicious attack on the Orange Bogey, Reilly is obviously a Demon Democrat. 

For sure, the Orange Bogey is the most proficient Presidential Golfer of All Time.  It is projected that the Orange Mulligan will play over 600 rounds of Golf during his eight years in office as President, far surpassing the previous record established by Barrack Obama who played 306 round of Golf in his eight years in office.

Barrack Obama currently holds the record for Rounds of Golf played as President

It is estimated that the Orange Slicer will have played over 600 Rounds of Golf during his eight years in office, a Record that may never be broken.

The Orange Birdie should get credit where credit is due.  He has kept most of his Campaign Promises………except 1.  During his Campaign, the Orange Sand Bunker said:

  • “I’m going to be working for you.  I’m not going to have time to play golf.”
  • “I love golf, but if I were in the White House, I don’t think I’d ever see Turnberry (a Trump Golf Resort) again, I don’t think I’d ever see Doral (a Trump Golf Resort) again, I don’t ever think I’d see anything — I just want to stay in the White House and work my ass off, make great deals, right? Who’s gonna leave?”
The Orange Pinocchio has only flipped on one Campaign promise, not bad.
“Many People Say” you know when the Lier Lier Orange Pants on Fire is lying……his lips are moving

The foundation of Golf, from weekend Duffers to the Pros, is that the Sport is self-managed, there are no Umpires or Referees.  So what are some of the Fake News allegations perpetrated by Rick Reilly on how the Orange Fairway Cheats when playing Golf:

  • Taking credit for several Club Championships when he did not complete in the Tournaments.
  • Lying about his Score
  • Hitting Multiple Balls without counting the strokes
  • Sabotaging the shots of  his Opponents
  • Claiming during his Campaign that he was a “Winner” having won 18 Club Championships”
  • Claiming to have a 3 Handicap but Pros he has played with estimate that he probably is really a 10 Handicap
  • Taking a Competitors Golf Ball and throwing it into a Sand Bunker
  • Driving his Golf Cart across the Green
  • Always Tees off First even if he does not have the “Honors” (best score on the previous hole) and then drives down the Fairway before his Competitors hit their Tee Shot
  • Hitting a ball into Water and claiming he did not see it so he takes a second free shot
  • Putting a lower number on the Score Card than what he actually scored
The Orange Gimmie has been accused of Cheating when playing Golf

But is the Orange Stroke Play a Cheater when he plays Golf?  Sarkes says Whooooa, not so fast.  If one is playing Golf by USGA Rules then, yes, the Orange Ball Mark is a Cheater.  BUT, there are more than one set of Rules when playing Golf.  As an example, at the Spring Run Golf Club in Bonita Springs, FL, Sarkes home course, neighbor Eric Pedersen has developed an innovated set of Alternative Rules of Golf that are different from those used by the USGA.  As such, when using the Pedersen Rules of Golf one could be accused of Cheating under the USGA Rules of Golf.

Eric Pedersen, originator of the Pedersen Alternative Rules of Golf

In his Book, Rick Reilly asked;  Why does no one push back at all? Why does everyone he plays with just smile and let him cheat?.  The answer:  

Because it’s his course. You get to play free, and he’s probably gonna pay for lunch, but all that matters is that he wins. That’s the only requirement when you’re on the Trump train.

“Many People Say”; Sarkes, who cares? It doesn’t even matter does it?

Well, Sarkes, a High Handicapper, does not know if any of accusations that the Orange Worm Burner are true.  But, golf is based on integrity. Golfers call their own penalties. So if the Orange Divot Cheats at Golf, then why wouldn’t he cheat on Taxes, Wives, Elections, Suppliers, things he said he said to people, things he wrote, etc? He could lie about anything if he’s gonna lie about Golf. 

But, on the other hand, this could all be another Vicious Attack, Hoax, Witch Hunt, Hit Job, Illegal Take Down, and Treasonous attack against the Orange Flop Shot. 

Trouble at the Trump International Hotel in DC

Executive Summary:

  • A Pennsylvania man was arrested at Trump hotel Packing Heat 
  • “Many People Say” that this is a travesty of justice by the DC Police

Thanks to Sarkeses man on the street in DC, Chris Agrawal, for this story from the posh Trump International Hotel in DC.  

The Trump International Hotel is a 5 Star Luxury hotel on Pennsylvania Ave.  Rooms start at $500 a night and is the hotel of choice of many foreign dignitaries, including Russian Oligarchs and friends of Vlads Putin.  Trump Enterprises transformed the iconic US Post Office on Pennsylvania Ave into THE place to stay in DC (if you have TRICKLE DOWN).

The Old Post Office on Pennsylvania Ave is now the Trump International Hotel

Of course, Demon Dems and the Liberal Press maintain that foreign dignitaries staying in the Trump International Hotel in DC is a violation of the Emoluments clause of the US Constitution;  Article I, Section 9, Paragraph 8, that prohibits federal office holders from receiving any gift, payment, or other thing of value from a foreign state or its rulers, officers, or representatives.  Maybe the foreign dignitaries and politicians just like a nice place to stay when in DC.  

Can’t the Demon Dems and Liberal Press give the Orange Entrepreneur a break?  In his first two years in office, the Orange Pinocchio has never given us reason to doubt his truthfulness and integrity, ……. just ask him.  So when the Orange Hotelier says that foreigners staying at the Trump International Hotel in DC do not influence him, we can take him at this good word, right?

The Trump International Hotel is DC is the favorite hotel for foreign rulers, politicians and oligarchs.  

The Lobby of the Trump Hotel in DC has Uber Opulence, just like its owner

But back on Point.   A man from Pennsylvania, Lee McCartney, 49, of Norristown, has been charged with bringing a handgun loaded with 15 hollow-point bullets to the Trump International Hotel in WDC during an event at which the U.S. Secret Service was screening guests.  

McCartney told agents he had the Smith & Wesson in his car as he pulled up to a security checkpoint at the hotel’s entrance.  McCartney was arrested by D.C. police and charged with possessing an unregistered handgun and unregistered ammunition. While McCartney had a valid permit from Pennsylvania to carry a concealed weapon. DC Police said he was not registered to carry a weapon in the District.

Donors backing President Trump’s reelection had gathered at the hotel Tuesday. Guests included industry executives, along with Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin and Vice President Pence.

The President of the NRA, Carolyn Meadows said: “The NRA has been lobbying Congress to have Concealed Carry permits valid across the country.  Mr. McCartney’s 2nd Amendment Rights were violated by the DC Police when they confiscated his Fire Arm, and arrested him, a clear violation of his 2nd Amendment Right to Bear Arms”

The NRA is hurting for membership so picked a Skirt, Carolyn Meadows as its new President

The Orange Commander in Tweets tweeted:

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – May 9 @ 4:46AM

This is another Travesty, a Hit Job, a Which Hunt, a Coup, a Failed Take Down against a great American and one of my Base, Lee McCartney, perpetrated by the DC Police.  Instead of harassing my Base they should be confiscating the illegal firearms used by the Black and Hispanic Gangs in DC.

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – May 9 @ 5:32AM

I beat the Democrats with the largest Electoral College victory in History, History!  And if you take away the 5 Million votes casted by Illegal Mexicans I would have had a record victory in the popular vote.  Now, the Democrats are harassing my Base to keep them from voting for me in 2020.

Most of the Orange Rifleman’s Base Pack Heat

Sarkes is no stranger to the Trump International Hotel in DC.  Sarkes was to meet the Orange Monarch there on 4 occasions but was stiffed by the Orange Duffer who chose instead to head to Mir-a-Lago for several rounds of golf.

Sarkes and friend Shep at the Trump International Hotel after being stiffed by the Orange Dotard

The Orange Flagstick in a Golf shirt is not a pretty site

Follow-Up: Le Or-aange Donald Trump

Executive Summary:

–  Sarkes had tried to explain why Donald Trump has an Orange Hue

–  Sarkes has upset the Hornets Nest.

In a recent Sarkes Corner, with purpose to explain why Donald Trump is Orange to his Canadian friends, Sarkes concluded that the Orange POTUS must be using Self-Tanning Creams.

Donald Trump is Orange.

Immediately, the Orange Counterpuncher went into Twitter Mode:

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 15 @ 4:07 AM

What a bunch of Bull S – – t from Sarkes.  I DO NOT USE TANNING CREAMS !!!!!!!  I just had my annual physical and I am the healthiest President of all time, all time!  My skin color is natural and can be attributed to good genes.  This is another Witch Hunt.

Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 15 @ 4:49 AM

Sarkes you are seriously flawed and your Low Rated Sarkes Corner is failing.  What a hypocrite.  I know many Armenians and they aren’t as Brown as you.  If anyone is using Tanning Creams it is you.  You have FAKE Brown skin and a Low IQ. You must be using TANNING CREAMS!!!!

Sarkes is Brown but son David no so much.

Sarkes friend, Intelligent Engineer, WDC Man on the Street, and Sarkes Corner Contributor, Ashok Agrawal, did some independent research on why Donald Trump is Orange.  Surprisingly, Ashok agrees with the Orange Polyp.  Ashok reports:

From the New England Journal of Medicine: “Orange is not a primary color but a secondary color.  Orange is made by mixing the colors red and yellow.  Genealogists conclude:  If Donald Trump is not using Tanning Creams, as he claims, his ancestors must be Native Indians (Red) and Asian (Yellow).  A mixed gene Donald Trump is therefore Orange. 

Sarkes, a Conservative Progressive Independent running for President in 2020, and also a Counter Puncher, tweeted:

Sarkes@realSarkes – February 15 @ 10:30 AM

President Trump, Americans don’t care about your Tax Returns but Americans want to know why you are Orange.  You can put this to bed once and for all if you take a Genealogy Test  from 23 and Me or Ancestry . Com.  Sarkes is sending a kit to the White House.  Sarkes is willing to bet $1 million to the charity of Trump’s choice (except Trump Enterprises) if a DNA test proves that Trump has Native American and Asian heritage.  

Also, Sarkes Corner investigative reporters went on assignment to Oklahoma.  With the cooperation of the Tribal Council of the Cherokee Nation, a picture taken in 1889 of a Tribal elder, Chief Tiny Hands, has a strong resemblance to Donald Trump.  Chief Tiny Hands also had a brother, a Warrior, Running Mouth.  Are Chief Tiny Hands and Warrior Running Mouth related to Donald Trump?

Cherokee Chief Tiny Hands circa 1889.

Following another lead, Sarkes Corner reporters went to South Korea and found what could be an illegitimate child that Donald Trump fathered with a South Korean Stripper.  When interviewed, the boy, Ying Yang Hung Lo, stated that he does not know who is his father and that his hair and skin color are natural.  Hung Lo stated that his mother was a large breasted Stripper who often hooked up with Rich Americans.  Can this explain Trump’s affection to his new Boy Toy Kim Jung Un?

Is Ying Yang Hung Lo Trump’s illegitimate son?

Le Or-aange Donald Trump

Executive Summary:

  • No one knows what makes Donald Trump Orange
  • There are many theories

Sarkes thanks Canadian neighbor Dennis Parras for an article out of the Canadian Broadcast Corporation (CBC) asking why President Trump is Orange. 

Canadians have long been confused by our Orange POTUS and Dennis often peppers our Silver Creek Conservative Men’s Breakfast Club with questions about things that the Golden Blabbermouth says, and then walks back. Alas, the true Conservatives of the Silver Creek Breakfast Club always have an answer for Dennis.

Canadians are confused, and Trudeau is
cautious with the Orange Pickpocket

The biggest mystery to Canadians is how President Donald Trump manages to maintain his bright fluorescent orange glow regardless of the season.  Officially, the White House line is that Trump gets his glow from “good genes,”.

Donald Trump is Orange

Theories have been floated to explain Trump’s skin color, including tanning beds, spray tan, and make-up.

Tanning Beds were immediately ruled out, as LEAKER, Sarkeses source in the White House, insists that there isn’t a Tanning Bed OR Spray Tan Booths in the White House.  Also, a tanning bed also would not explain why Trump’s Orange face is a completely different color from the paler skin on his tiny hands. 

Trumps face is Orange yet his
Tiny Hands are a Pale White

Cosmetologists tell Sarkes that since the Orange Ameba looks more orange than tan, he most likely is using self-tanner creams or sprays.

Donald Trump uses Self-tanning creams and sprays

LEAKER also tells Sarkes that the Orange Traffic Cone is self-conscious of his Orange hue, and has voiced complaints to aides that he appears too orange on television.   This has led to staff dimming the lighting of many White House events. Trump also likes to use natural light, which reduces the orange glow, and has chosen to host press conferences in the sunny Rose Garden.

Donald Trump is not so
Orange when in the Rose Garden

In a future Sarkes Corner, Sarkes will explain to this Canadian friends how Donald Trumps hair stays Orange while every other American President goes gray.  

Your’e Fired!!

Executive Summary:

– The Orange Chetto is clamping down on Illegal Immigration at our Southern Border
– And, even at his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs

The Orange Slurrpee is no hypocrite. The Gold Finger is fighting Congress to build a Great Beautiful Wall to protect us from the Illegal Mexican Rapists, Drug Attics, and Gangs that are invading our southern border every day. The Orange Julius is not stopping there. At his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs, the Golden Arches is purging any illegal employees that have invaded his properties.

The Orange Duffer has already set a record for most Golf Rounds played while serving as an American President….and in only 2 years!

A dozen immigrant workers at Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County, NY, were fired this month even though Trump Golf Club Managers had known about their legal status for years.

The Manager at the Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County called a dozen immigrant workers into a room and fired them, one by one. A Confidential Source told Sarkes that these firings were taped for a possible new TV Series: “The Immigrant Apprentice”. Each Immigrant was given those now famous words – “YOUR’E FIRED!”

The Golden Globe single handily saved NBC from Bankruptcy with the Greatest Show in TV History, The Apprentice.

Most of the Illegals who invaded the Trump Golf Club had worked there for over 10 years. This is like those Russian Sleeper Cells that invaded the US in the FX TV series “The Americans”. Sarkes Highly recommends you watch the 6 seasons of “The Americans” now showing on Amazon Prime.

But Sarkes digresses, back on point.

The Lawyer for the Illegal Invaders said that Trump Managers knew they had submitted phony documents but looked the other way. This is obviously Fake News and Alternative Facts. Our Commander in Tweets would never engage in any illegal activities. This is another Witch Hunt.

The Orange Traffic Cone has been the victim of countless Witch Hunts.

The heir to the Trump Throne, Eric Trump, depicted the firings to the Post as a normal course of business. “We are making a broad effort to identify any employee who has given false and fraudulent documents to unlawfully gain employment,” he said. “Where identified, any individual will be terminated immediately.”

Eric Trump added: “the system is broken.” Sarkes agrees, it took the Trump Empire over 10 years to seek and purge the Illegal Invaders working at their Trump International Hotels and Golf Courses. Hmmmmmmmmm

Hmmmmmm, Sarkes always wondered why we focus on the Illegal Invaders who are taking our American jobs and never mention the American Employers who hire the Illegal Invaders. Are the Illegal Invaders smarter than the American Employers?

FIRED, Carlos Lopez fired after 12 years working the grounds at Trump National Golf Club

FIRED, Maria Gonzales fired after 10 years working at the Trump International Hotel

Trump verses The Generals

Executive Summary:

– The Orange Commandant has won the war with the generals

During the Republican Primary for the 2016 Presidential Election, the Golden Exalted Leader systematically eliminated 16 other GOP candidates on his way to winning the Presidential election by the largest margin in US History, History!

During the Republican Primary and later, the Orange Generali unleashed a vicious attack on the Generals of our United Stated Military. Notable quotes from the Golden Admiral about our Generals:

– “I know more about ISIS than the generals do, Believe me.”
– “The Generals don’t know much because they’re not winning,”
– (American Generals) “have been reduced to rubble. They have been reduced to a point where it’s embarrassing to our country.”
– “There’s nobody bigger or better at the military than I am.”
– “I would have made a great General”

Gerneralimisio Donald Trump in full General’s Regatta

So it was somewhat surprising that when the Orange Oligarch put his Senior Leadership Team and Cabinet together, he selected several high-profile Generals. The act of selecting ignorant and ineffective Generals for his Cabinet is evidence that the Golden Palomino is a kind, benevolent Leader, giving the ignorant and ineffective Generals a chance for redemption.

Alas, the Orange Einstein should have followed his initial instinct, after all, he is “a very stable genius”. The ignorant and ineffective Generals have now gotten the Old Heave Ho.

Trumps Generals got the Old Heave Ho

Sarkes takes inventory of the ignorant and ineffective Generals:

General 1: Retired three star Lt. Gen. Mike Flynn was selected as the National Security Adviser. Flynn became a senior advisor to the Orange Emperor during his presidential campaign and served as the National Security Advisor from January 23 to February 13, 2017. Flynn resigned after information surfaced that he had misled the FBI and Vice President Pence about the nature and content of his communications with Commie Ambassador to the U.S. Sergy Kislvak. Flynn’s tenure of just 24 days is the shortest in the office’s history.

Disgraced, Ignorant and Ineffective General Michael Flynn

General 2: After Flynn was forced out of the White House, Lt. Gen. H.R. McMaster assumed the role of national security adviser. McMaster remained on active duty as a lieutenant general while serving as National Security Advisor, and retired in May 2018. McMaster resigned as National Security Advisor on March 22, 2018.

Ignorant and Ineffective General H. R. McMaster

General 3: General Francis Kelly is a retired Marine Corps General who served as the White House Chief of Staff for the Golden Exalted Leader. Kelly was selected as the Secretary of Homeland Security. Kelly earned a reputation for being an aggressive enforcer of immigration law. After six months, he was selected to replace Reince Priebus as White House Chief of Staff in an attempt to bring more stability to the White House. Over time the Trump / Kelly bromance fizzled, and Kelly, no longer on speaking terms with the President, left as chief of staff at the end of December 2018.

Ignorant and Ineffective General John Kelly

General 4: General James Norman Mattis (Maddog) served as the Secretary of Defense from January 2017 until December 2018. He resigned over policy differences with the Orange 5 Star on troop withdrawals from Afghanistan. Maddog is a retired Marine Corp General who served in the Persian Gulf War, War in Afghanistan and the Iraq War. Maddog occasionally voiced his disagreement with certain Golden Goliath’s administration policies, opposing the proposed withdrawal from the Iran nuclear deal and budget cuts. The Orange Marmalade believed that Maddog was really a Democrat.

Ignorant and Ineffective General Maddog Mattis was a Democrat

General 5: Admiral William Harry McRaven is a former Navy officer who last served as commander of the US Special Operations Command from August 8, 2011, to August 28, 2014. Chris Wallace, of Fox News Fair and Balanced, asked the Golden Commandant about retired Adm. Bill McRaven’s comments that his attacks on the news media were “the greatest threat to democracy in my lifetime.” The Orange Oligarch told Wallace that McRaven was a “Hillary fan,” and when Wallace pointed out that McRaven was the architect of the raid that killed Osama bin Laden in Pakistan in 2011, the Golden Goliath said, “Wouldn’t it have been nice if we got Osama bin Laden a lot sooner than that, wouldn’t it have been nice?”

Ignorant and Ineffective, Hillary Fan, Admiral William Harry McRaven took too long to catch Osama bin Laden

General 6: Stanley McChrystal, led Joint Special Operations Command during the Iraq War and had turned it into one of the most efficient killing machines in history. McChrystal later resigned as the commander of the Afghan War in 2010 following disparaging remarks that some officers on his staff had made to a Rolling Stone reporter about top officials working for President Barack Obama. In an interview with ABC, McChrystal described Trump as both immoral and dishonest. The Orange Counterpuncher tweeted: ”’General’ McChrystal got fired like a dog by Obama. Last assignment a total bust. Known for big, dumb mouth. Hillary lover!”

Ignorant and Ineffective General Stanley McCrystal is a Hillary Lover, total bust, and dumb as a Dog

Sarkes understands that many Americans were skeptical when the Orange Pinocchio said that he was smarter than all of our Generals. Just think of how much more the Golden Exhaled Leader could have accomplished if he had Generals like Patton or Ike.

Trump needs Generals like General George Patton, a Real Mans Man

Kenya West, Blexit, and The Bromance

Executive Summary:

– Kanye West is now distancing himself from Blexit and Donald Trump claiming: “I’ve been used to spread bad messages”

– This has Uuuuuuuuge ramifications on Sarkeses Prediction that the Orange Oracle will win the 2020 Presidential Election on the coat tails of Blacks.

Frist, Sarkes is sure that his Rich, Old, White, Friends have no idea what is Blexit. Blexit is short for “Black Exit,” a movement and clothes line urging Black voters to leave the Democratic Party. The Blexit movement encourages Blacks to abandon the emotionally abusive relationship with the Democratic party in pursuit of freedom over tyranny.

Like the Orange MLK said to Blacks during his historical run for President: “You’re living in poverty, your schools are no good, you have no jobs, 58% of your youth is unemployed — what the hell do you have to lose?”

Well, several Black Leaders; Omarosa Manigault, Mike Tyson, Diamond & Silk, Terrel Ownes, and Dennis Rodman are passionate supporters of the Golden Brutha. But none more powerful than Ye, formerly know as Kenya West.

Trump Supporter Mike Tyson

Trump Supporters Diamond and Silk

Trump Supporter and US Ambassador to North Korea Dennis Rodman

But now, Kenya West says that he is done with politics and that his Bromance with the Orange Casanova is over. In Street language, Donald Trump is no longer Kenya’s Bitch.

Less than a month after his bizarre visit with the Golden Commandant at the White House, where Kenya spewed a nonsensical, meandering, 10 minute, F-Bomb ladened, monologue, Kenya told the world that he had been misdiagnosed with Bipolar Disorder when he was actually merely sleep deprived.

Kenya West at the White House with the Orange Brutha

Well, Kenya must have caught up on his sleep. He now claims that he has been used and become a Political Pawn. Kenya said: “My eyes are now wide open and now realize I’ve been used to spread messages I don’t believe in. I am distancing myself from politics and completely focusing on being Creative!!!”

Kenya also wants to clear his name after the Blexit campaign launched a line of Shirts and Hats that touted: “Design by Kanye West”. Kenya now claims that he never wanted any association with Blexit or it’s founder Candace Owens.

Blexit Founder and Reagan / Trumpian Conservative Candace Owens

Candace Owens said: “Blexit is a renaissance movement and I am blessed to say that the Blexit logo and Blexit colors were created by my dear friend and superhero Kenya West”

Order your Quality Blexit Merchandise before the Mid Term Elections

Kenya wanting to set the record straight said: “I have nothing to do with Blexit”

Sarkes understands that we may never know the truth here and there are more questions than answers such as:

Was Kenya sleep deprived when he developed the Blexit clothing line and just doesn’t remember?

Is Kenya’s Bromance with his Orange Bitch really over?

Is the Bromance Over?

While Kenya and Omarosa have turned on the Golden Brutha, will other Black supporters; Mike Tyson, Diamond & Silk, Terrel Ownes, Hershell Walker, and Dennis Rodman stay committed?

Benedict Arnold Turncoat Omarosa

And where is the Black Guy with the White “Blacks for Trump” T-shirt at the Orange Monarch’s Political Rallies? He has been no where to be seen recently, has he turned on the Orange Brutha?

Why has Michael the Black Guy been missing from recent Trump Rallies?

Will Sarkes need to walk back his prediction that the Golden Gulag will win the 2020 Presidential Election on the coat tails of Blacks? Since Sarkes is rarely wrong, he is confident that Black America will come thru for Orange MLK in 2020, after all, “What the hell do they have to lose”.

Donald Trump and Ass Wipe

Executive Summary:

– The Orange Charmin boards Air Force One with Toilet Paper stuck to his shoe

“Please don’t squeeze the Charmin!”

Forget this brew ha ha over the Judge Kavanaugh Supreme Court Confirmation hearings, the big news from last week is that the Golden Cottonelle boarded Air Force 1 with a strip of Ass Wipe hanging off the back of his loafer.

“Cottonelle, Looking out for the Family”

“Many People Say”, Sarkes, Ass Wipe!, Ass Wipe!, what are you talking about? Well, when Sarkes was an Engineering student at the Missouri University of Science and Technology (S&T), toilet paper was called Ass Wipe. Sarkes cannot make this stuff up. This can be confirmed by thousands of Engineers who attended S&T in the 1970’s.

Missouri S&T Mascot Joe Miner Packs Heat and a Slide Rule

“Many People Say”, Sarkes, when you were an Engineering Student at S&T did you drink Beer? Sarkes responds: Sometimes Sarkes had too many beers. Sarkes liked beer. Sarkes does not like beer anymore. But Sarkes never drank beer to the point of blacking out. Sarkes is innocent, innocent of any charges associated with his time at S&T!

At MO S&T, sometimes Sarkes had too many beers, but Sarkes never drank beer to the point of blacking out.

Sarkes and Chris at MO S&T, Sarkes drank beer and girlfriend Chris (now wife) drank Diet Coke.

But Sarkes digresses, back of Point.

The Ass Wipe incident happened as The Orange Scotts was departing Minneapolis. After sticking with the president all the way up the stairs to Air Force 1, the Toilet paper finally loosened its grip once Trump walked aboard. 

“Scott Toilet Paper, Going, Going, still not Gone.”

Now Sarkes says, who amongst us has not walked out of a toilet only to find that we were dragging a piece of Ass Wipe on our shoes or hanging out the bottom of our pants? But what is interesting here is that NO ONE stopped the Golden Papyrus from walking up the stairs to Air Force 1 with Ass Wipe stuck to his shoe, NO ONE? This was not just a small piece of Ass Wipe stuck to a shoe. Someone; the Secret Service, the Marine Guard, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Someone, had to see this Ass Wipe dragging behind the Orange Toilet Roll.

Trump starts up stairs to Air Force 1 with Ass Wipe on his shoe.

Trump reaches the top of the stairs to Air For 1 with Ass Wipe on his shoe.

The Golden Crapper is always surrounded by at least a dozen people at all times. Is this just another step in the Mega Conspiracy to bring down the Reich of our Orange Fuhrer? History will show that this Conspiracy was Uuuuuge, a conspiracy of Demon Dems, Liberal Media, RINOs, and Benedict Arnolds. Is the Secret Service part of this Conspiracy?

Sarkeses White House Source, LEAKER, has told Sarkes that the Orange Thug is pissed that no-one stopped him from boarding Air Force 1 with Ass Wipe on his shoe. LEAKER says that the Golden Counter Puncher has ordered the FBI to determine which company; Proctor and Gamble, Kleenex, or the Scott Paper Company, produced the Ass Wipe that stuck to his shoe. There will be hell to pay.

Finally, the Orange Merchandiser is very familiar with Ass Wipe. The Trump Enterprises Merchandise offerings include: ties, suits, dress shirts, eyeglasses, spring water, vodka, education (Trump University), and of course, Ass Wipe.

Donald Trump Ass Wipe, very popular and profitable.