Is it possible that the Orange Cantaloupe and Sarkes have enough in Common that they are 2 Peas in a Pod?
“Many People Say” Sarkes, you and the Orange Jumpsuit have so much in common that you are 2 Peas in a Pod.
At first, Sarkes was in Full Denial. How could this be? Sarkes, a Truth Machine, stepped away from this story and asked his Crack Sarkes Corner Investigative Team to investigate.
In a somber meeting at the Sarkes Corner Headquarters, the Harsh Facts were laid out for Sarkes by the Sarkes Corner Investigative Team:
1. Sarkes and the Orange Creamsicle were both Democrats before becoming Republicans.
2. Not only did Sarkes and the Orange Ameba switched to become Republicans, both became staunch Reagan Conservatives.
3. The Orange Commander in Tweets and Sarkes did not serve in the Viet Nam War. The Orange Podiatrist had Bone Spurs and Sarkes had a High Draft Lottery Number (Young Subscribers to Sarkes Corner need to Google “Viet Nam Era Draft Lottery” for details).
4. The Orange Exalted Leader and Sarkes have both been the Victims of Investigations. The Orange Goliath was victimized by Mueller and the 17 “Angry Democrats”. Sarkes was investigated by the “16 Angry Sweeds” on the Nobel Committee for Plagiarism while writing the Award Winning Sarkes Corner. Both Investigations were Phony, a Hoax, Hit Job, Witch Hunt, Failed Takedown, Treasonous, and a Thousand Stabs, a Thousand.
5. Both Sarkes and the Orange Flag Stick love to play Golf. The Orange Divot uses the USGA Rules of Golf and Cheats to get his Low Handicap. Sarkes uses the Eric Pedersen Rules of Golf but still has a High Handicap.
6. Both Sarkes and the Orange Tangerine are Colored. Trump is Orange and Sarkes is a Brown Man. Being people of Color has not stopped the Orange Zest or Sarkes from accomplishing great things.
7. Both the Orange Einstein and Sarkes are Extremely STABLE GENIUSES. The Orange Monarchs Lackeys are often paraded in front of the Fox News Cameras to give testimony on the Genius of the Orange Intellect. On the other hand, Sarkeses Genius is demonstrated in Sarkes Corner.
8. The Orange Pacifier and Sarkes are always Cool and Calm. At a recent Sarkes Corner Staff Meeting, Sarkes took a poll of the Sarkes Corner staff and was told:
“Sarkes, You were very Calm, and you laid out the case”
“You are Calm, very Calm”
“You are always Calm”
“I don’t know how you stay so Calm”
Sarkes, a perennial finalist for the Nobel Prize in Mathematics, can make an inference from only 1 Data Point. Here, the Sarkes Corner Staff has provided 8 Data Points, 8!, that the Orange Tabby and Sarkes have much in common. Now that’s powerful, indisputable Data.
Well, there you have it, the Harsh Truth, Proof Positive that the Orange Crush and Sarkes are indeed, 2 Peas in a Pod.
Rick Reilly has written a book about how the Orange Duffer Cheats at Golf
Is this just another Vicious Attack, Hoax, Witch Hunt, Hit Job, Illegal Take Down, and Treasonous attack against the Orange Caddie?
There are a number of different Rules of Golf, so what seems like Cheating may not be. At Spring Run, some of us use the Pedersen Alternate Rules of Golf
The Orange Flag Stick is under constant Siege by the Liberal Press and Demon Democrats. The latest assault against the Orange Shanker is from Sports Writer, Rick Reilly. While both are famous Writers, do not mistake Rick Reilly for Bill Reilly.
Rick Reilly’s new book; COMMANDER IN CHEAT, documents that the Orange Flag Stick is a Serial Cheater when he plays Golf. In addition to his Sports books, Reilly is best known for his work on ESPN and ABC Sports. With his vicious attack on the Orange Bogey, Reilly is obviously a Demon Democrat.
For sure, the Orange Bogey is the most proficient Presidential Golfer of All Time. It is projected that the Orange Mulligan will play over 600 rounds of Golf during his eight years in office as President, far surpassing the previous record established by Barrack Obama who played 306 round of Golf in his eight years in office.
The Orange Birdie should get credit where credit is due. He has kept most of his Campaign Promises………except 1. During his Campaign, the Orange Sand Bunker said:
“I’m going to be working for you. I’m not going to have time to play golf.”
“I love golf, but if I were in the White House, I don’t think I’d ever see Turnberry (a Trump Golf Resort) again, I don’t think I’d ever see Doral (a Trump Golf Resort) again, I don’t ever think I’d see anything — I just want to stay in the White House and work my ass off, make great deals, right? Who’s gonna leave?”
The foundation of Golf, from weekend Duffers to the Pros, is that the Sport is self-managed, there are no Umpires or Referees. So what are some of the Fake News allegations perpetrated by Rick Reilly on how the Orange Fairway Cheats when playing Golf:
Taking credit for several Club Championships when he did not complete in the Tournaments.
Lying about his Score
Hitting Multiple Balls without counting the strokes
Sabotaging the shots of his Opponents
Claiming during his Campaign that he was a “Winner” having won 18 Club Championships”
Claiming to have a 3 Handicap but Pros he has played with estimate that he probably is really a 10 Handicap
Taking a Competitors Golf Ball and throwing it into a Sand Bunker
Driving his Golf Cart across the Green
Always Tees off First even if he does not have the “Honors” (best score on the previous hole) and then drives down the Fairway before his Competitors hit their Tee Shot
Hitting a ball into Water and claiming he did not see it so he takes a second free shot
Putting a lower number on the Score Card than what he actually scored
But is the Orange Stroke Play a Cheater when he plays Golf? Sarkes says Whooooa, not so fast. If one is playing Golf by USGA Rules then, yes, the Orange Ball Mark is a Cheater. BUT, there are more than one set of Rules when playing Golf. As an example, at the Spring Run Golf Club in Bonita Springs, FL, Sarkes home course, neighbor Eric Pedersen has developed an innovated set of Alternative Rules of Golf that are different from those used by the USGA. As such, when using the Pedersen Rules of Golf one could be accused of Cheating under the USGA Rules of Golf.
In his Book, Rick Reilly asked; Why does no one push back at all? Why does everyone he plays with just smile and let him cheat?. The answer:
Because it’s his course. You get to play free, and he’s probably gonna pay for lunch, but all that matters is that he wins. That’s the only requirement when you’re on the Trump train.
“Many People Say”; Sarkes, who cares? It doesn’t even matter does it?
Well, Sarkes, a High Handicapper, does not know if any of accusations that the Orange Worm Burner are true. But, golf is based on integrity. Golfers call their own penalties. So if the Orange Divot Cheats at Golf, then why wouldn’t he cheat on Taxes, Wives, Elections, Suppliers, things he said he said to people, things he wrote, etc? He could lie about anything if he’s gonna lie about Golf.
But, on the other hand, this could all be another Vicious Attack, Hoax, Witch Hunt, Hit Job, Illegal Take Down, and Treasonous attack against the Orange Flop Shot.
A Pennsylvania man was arrested at Trump hotel Packing Heat
“Many People Say” that this is a travesty of justice by the DC Police
Thanks to Sarkeses man on the street in DC, Chris Agrawal, for this story from the posh Trump International Hotel in DC.
The Trump International Hotel is a 5 Star Luxury hotel on Pennsylvania Ave. Rooms start at $500 a night and is the hotel of choice of many foreign dignitaries, including Russian Oligarchs and friends of Vlads Putin. Trump Enterprises transformed the iconic US Post Office on Pennsylvania Ave into THE place to stay in DC (if you have TRICKLE DOWN).
Of course, Demon Dems and the Liberal Press maintain that foreign dignitaries staying in the Trump International Hotel in DC is a violation of the Emoluments clause of the US Constitution; Article I, Section 9, Paragraph 8, that prohibits federal office holders from receiving any gift, payment, or other thing of value from a foreign state or its rulers, officers, or representatives. Maybe the foreign dignitaries and politicians just like a nice place to stay when in DC.
Can’t the Demon Dems and Liberal Press give the Orange Entrepreneur a break? In his first two years in office, the Orange Pinocchio has never given us reason to doubt his truthfulness and integrity, ……. just ask him. So when the Orange Hotelier says that foreigners staying at the Trump International Hotel in DC do not influence him, we can take him at this good word, right?
But back on Point. A man from Pennsylvania, Lee McCartney, 49, of Norristown, has been charged with bringing a handgun loaded with 15 hollow-point bullets to the Trump International Hotel in WDC during an event at which the U.S. Secret Service was screening guests.
McCartney told agents he had the Smith & Wesson in his car as he pulled up to a security checkpoint at the hotel’s entrance. McCartney was arrested by D.C. police and charged with possessing an unregistered handgun and unregistered ammunition. While McCartney had a valid permit from Pennsylvania to carry a concealed weapon. DC Police said he was not registered to carry a weapon in the District.
Donors backing President Trump’s reelection had gathered at the hotel Tuesday. Guests included industry executives, along with Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin and Vice President Pence.
The President of the NRA, Carolyn Meadows said: “The NRA has been lobbying Congress to have Concealed Carry permits valid across the country. Mr. McCartney’s 2nd Amendment Rights were violated by the DC Police when they confiscated his Fire Arm, and arrested him, a clear violation of his 2nd Amendment Right to Bear Arms”
The Orange Commander in Tweets tweeted:
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – May 9 @ 4:46AM
This is another Travesty, a Hit Job, a Which Hunt, a Coup, a Failed Take Down against a great American and one of my Base, Lee McCartney, perpetrated by the DC Police. Instead of harassing my Base they should be confiscating the illegal firearms used by the Black and Hispanic Gangs in DC.
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – May 9 @ 5:32AM
I beat the Democrats with the largest Electoral College victory in History, History! And if you take away the 5 Million votes casted by Illegal Mexicans I would have had a record victory in the popular vote. Now, the Democrats are harassing my Base to keep them from voting for me in 2020.
Sarkes is no stranger to the Trump International Hotel in DC. Sarkes was to meet the Orange Monarch there on 4 occasions but was stiffed by the Orange Duffer who chose instead to head to Mir-a-Lago for several rounds of golf.
– Sarkes had tried to explain why Donald Trump has an Orange Hue
– Sarkes has upset the Hornets Nest.
In a recent Sarkes Corner, with purpose to explain why Donald Trump is Orange to his Canadian friends, Sarkes concluded that the Orange POTUS must be using Self-Tanning Creams.
Immediately, the Orange Counterpuncher went into Twitter Mode:
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 15 @ 4:07 AM
What a bunch of Bull S – – t from Sarkes. I DO NOT USE TANNING CREAMS !!!!!!! I just had my annual physical and I am the healthiest President of all time, all time! My skin color is natural and can be attributed to good genes. This is another Witch Hunt.
Donald J. Trump @ realDonaldTrump – February 15 @ 4:49 AM
Sarkes you are seriously flawed and your Low Rated Sarkes Corner is failing. What a hypocrite. I know many Armenians and they aren’t as Brown as you. If anyone is using Tanning Creams it is you. You have FAKE Brown skin and a Low IQ. You must be using TANNING CREAMS!!!!
Sarkes friend, Intelligent Engineer, WDC Man on the Street, and Sarkes Corner Contributor, Ashok Agrawal, did some independent research on why Donald Trump is Orange. Surprisingly, Ashok agrees with the Orange Polyp. Ashok reports:
From the New England Journal of Medicine: “Orange is not a primary color but a secondary color. Orange is made by mixing the colors red and yellow. Genealogists conclude: If Donald Trump is not using Tanning Creams, as he claims, his ancestors must be Native Indians (Red) and Asian (Yellow). A mixed gene Donald Trump is therefore Orange.
Sarkes, a Conservative Progressive Independent running for President in 2020, and also a Counter Puncher, tweeted:
Sarkes@realSarkes – February 15 @ 10:30 AM
President Trump, Americans don’t care about your Tax Returns but Americans want to know why you are Orange. You can put this to bed once and for all if you take a Genealogy Test from 23 and Me or Ancestry . Com. Sarkes is sending a kit to the White House. Sarkes is willing to bet $1 million to the charity of Trump’s choice (except Trump Enterprises) if a DNA test proves that Trump has Native American and Asian heritage.
Also, Sarkes Corner investigative reporters went on assignment to Oklahoma. With the cooperation of the Tribal Council of the Cherokee Nation, a picture taken in 1889 of a Tribal elder, Chief Tiny Hands, has a strong resemblance to Donald Trump. Chief Tiny Hands also had a brother, a Warrior, Running Mouth. Are Chief Tiny Hands and Warrior Running Mouth related to Donald Trump?
Following another lead, Sarkes Corner reporters went to South Korea and found what could be an illegitimate child that Donald Trump fathered with a South Korean Stripper. When interviewed, the boy, Ying Yang Hung Lo, stated that he does not know who is his father and that his hair and skin color are natural. Hung Lo stated that his mother was a large breasted Stripper who often hooked up with Rich Americans. Can this explain Trump’s affection to his new Boy Toy Kim Jung Un?
Sarkes thanks Canadian neighbor Dennis Parras for an article out of the Canadian Broadcast Corporation (CBC) asking why President Trump is Orange.
Canadians have long been confused by our Orange POTUS and Dennis often peppers our Silver Creek Conservative Men’s Breakfast Club with questions about things that the Golden Blabbermouth says, and then walks back. Alas, the true Conservatives of the Silver Creek Breakfast Club always have an answer for Dennis.
The biggest mystery to Canadians is how President Donald Trump manages to maintain his bright fluorescent orange glow regardless of the season. Officially, the White House line is that Trump gets his glow from “good genes,”.
Theories have been floated to explain Trump’s skin color, including tanning beds, spray tan, and make-up.
Tanning Beds were immediately ruled out, as LEAKER, Sarkeses source in the White House, insists that there isn’t a Tanning Bed OR Spray Tan Booths in the White House. Also, a tanning bed also would not explain why Trump’s Orange face is a completely different color from the paler skin on his tiny hands.
Cosmetologists tell Sarkes that since the Orange Ameba looks more orange than tan, he most likely is using self-tanner creams or sprays.
LEAKER also tells Sarkes that the Orange Traffic Cone is self-conscious of his Orange hue, and has voiced complaints to aides that he appears too orange on television. This has led to staff dimming the lighting of many White House events. Trump also likes to use natural light, which reduces the orange glow, and has chosen to host press conferences in the sunny Rose Garden.
In a future Sarkes Corner, Sarkes will explain to this Canadian friends how Donald Trumps hair stays Orange while every other American President goes gray.
– The Orange Chetto is clamping down on Illegal Immigration at our Southern Border
– And, even at his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs
The Orange Slurrpee is no hypocrite. The Gold Finger is fighting Congress to build a Great Beautiful Wall to protect us from the Illegal Mexican Rapists, Drug Attics, and Gangs that are invading our southern border every day. The Orange Julius is not stopping there. At his Trump International Hotels and Trump Golf Clubs, the Golden Arches is purging any illegal employees that have invaded his properties.
A dozen immigrant workers at Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County, NY, were fired this month even though Trump Golf Club Managers had known about their legal status for years.
The Manager at the Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County called a dozen immigrant workers into a room and fired them, one by one. A Confidential Source told Sarkes that these firings were taped for a possible new TV Series: “The Immigrant Apprentice”. Each Immigrant was given those now famous words – “YOUR’E FIRED!”
Most of the Illegals who invaded the Trump Golf Club had worked there for over 10 years. This is like those Russian Sleeper Cells that invaded the US in the FX TV series “The Americans”. Sarkes Highly recommends you watch the 6 seasons of “The Americans” now showing on Amazon Prime.
But Sarkes digresses, back on point.
The Lawyer for the Illegal Invaders said that Trump Managers knew they had submitted phony documents but looked the other way. This is obviously Fake News and Alternative Facts. Our Commander in Tweets would never engage in any illegal activities. This is another Witch Hunt.
The heir to the Trump Throne, Eric Trump, depicted the firings to the Post as a normal course of business. “We are making a broad effort to identify any employee who has given false and fraudulent documents to unlawfully gain employment,” he said. “Where identified, any individual will be terminated immediately.”
Eric Trump added: “the system is broken.” Sarkes agrees, it took the Trump Empire over 10 years to seek and purge the Illegal Invaders working at their Trump International Hotels and Golf Courses. Hmmmmmmmmm
Hmmmmmm, Sarkes always wondered why we focus on the Illegal Invaders who are taking our American jobs and never mention the American Employers who hire the Illegal Invaders. Are the Illegal Invaders smarter than the American Employers?
– The Orange Commandant has won the war with the generals
During the Republican Primary for the 2016 Presidential Election, the Golden Exalted Leader systematically eliminated 16 other GOP candidates on his way to winning the Presidential election by the largest margin in US History, History!
During the Republican Primary and later, the Orange Generali unleashed a vicious attack on the Generals of our United Stated Military. Notable quotes from the Golden Admiral about our Generals:
– “I know more about ISIS than the generals do, Believe me.”
– “The Generals don’t know much because they’re not winning,”
– (American Generals) “have been reduced to rubble. They have been reduced to a point where it’s embarrassing to our country.”
– “There’s nobody bigger or better at the military than I am.”
– “I would have made a great General”
So it was somewhat surprising that when the Orange Oligarch put his Senior Leadership Team and Cabinet together, he selected several high-profile Generals. The act of selecting ignorant and ineffective Generals for his Cabinet is evidence that the Golden Palomino is a kind, benevolent Leader, giving the ignorant and ineffective Generals a chance for redemption.
Alas, the Orange Einstein should have followed his initial instinct, after all, he is “a very stable genius”. The ignorant and ineffective Generals have now gotten the Old Heave Ho.
Sarkes takes inventory of the ignorant and ineffective Generals:
General 1: Retired three star Lt. Gen. Mike Flynn was selected as the National Security Adviser. Flynn became a senior advisor to the Orange Emperor during his presidential campaign and served as the National Security Advisor from January 23 to February 13, 2017. Flynn resigned after information surfaced that he had misled the FBI and Vice President Pence about the nature and content of his communications with Commie Ambassador to the U.S. Sergy Kislvak. Flynn’s tenure of just 24 days is the shortest in the office’s history.
General 2: After Flynn was forced out of the White House, Lt. Gen. H.R. McMaster assumed the role of national security adviser. McMaster remained on active duty as a lieutenant general while serving as National Security Advisor, and retired in May 2018. McMaster resigned as National Security Advisor on March 22, 2018.
General 3: General Francis Kelly is a retired Marine Corps General who served as the White House Chief of Staff for the Golden Exalted Leader. Kelly was selected as the Secretary of Homeland Security. Kelly earned a reputation for being an aggressive enforcer of immigration law. After six months, he was selected to replace Reince Priebus as White House Chief of Staff in an attempt to bring more stability to the White House. Over time the Trump / Kelly bromance fizzled, and Kelly, no longer on speaking terms with the President, left as chief of staff at the end of December 2018.
General 4: General James Norman Mattis (Maddog) served as the Secretary of Defense from January 2017 until December 2018. He resigned over policy differences with the Orange 5 Star on troop withdrawals from Afghanistan. Maddog is a retired Marine Corp General who served in the Persian Gulf War, War in Afghanistan and the Iraq War. Maddog occasionally voiced his disagreement with certain Golden Goliath’s administration policies, opposing the proposed withdrawal from the Iran nuclear deal and budget cuts. The Orange Marmalade believed that Maddog was really a Democrat.
General 5: Admiral William Harry McRaven is a former Navy officer who last served as commander of the US Special Operations Command from August 8, 2011, to August 28, 2014. Chris Wallace, of Fox News Fair and Balanced, asked the Golden Commandant about retired Adm. Bill McRaven’s comments that his attacks on the news media were “the greatest threat to democracy in my lifetime.” The Orange Oligarch told Wallace that McRaven was a “Hillary fan,” and when Wallace pointed out that McRaven was the architect of the raid that killed Osama bin Laden in Pakistan in 2011, the Golden Goliath said, “Wouldn’t it have been nice if we got Osama bin Laden a lot sooner than that, wouldn’t it have been nice?”
General 6: Stanley McChrystal, led Joint Special Operations Command during the Iraq War and had turned it into one of the most efficient killing machines in history. McChrystal later resigned as the commander of the Afghan War in 2010 following disparaging remarks that some officers on his staff had made to a Rolling Stone reporter about top officials working for President Barack Obama. In an interview with ABC, McChrystal described Trump as both immoral and dishonest. The Orange Counterpuncher tweeted: ”’General’ McChrystal got fired like a dog by Obama. Last assignment a total bust. Known for big, dumb mouth. Hillary lover!”
Sarkes understands that many Americans were skeptical when the Orange Pinocchio said that he was smarter than all of our Generals. Just think of how much more the Golden Exhaled Leader could have accomplished if he had Generals like Patton or Ike.
– Kanye West is now distancing himself from Blexit and Donald Trump claiming: “I’ve been used to spread bad messages”
– This has Uuuuuuuuge ramifications on Sarkeses Prediction that the Orange Oracle will win the 2020 Presidential Election on the coat tails of Blacks.
Frist, Sarkes is sure that his Rich, Old, White, Friends have no idea what is Blexit. Blexit is short for “Black Exit,” a movement and clothes line urging Black voters to leave the Democratic Party. The Blexit movement encourages Blacks to abandon the emotionally abusive relationship with the Democratic party in pursuit of freedom over tyranny.
Like the Orange MLK said to Blacks during his historical run for President: “You’re living in poverty, your schools are no good, you have no jobs, 58% of your youth is unemployed — what the hell do you have to lose?”
Well, several Black Leaders; Omarosa Manigault, Mike Tyson, Diamond & Silk, Terrel Ownes, and Dennis Rodman are passionate supporters of the Golden Brutha. But none more powerful than Ye, formerly know as Kenya West.
But now, Kenya West says that he is done with politics and that his Bromance with the Orange Casanova is over. In Street language, Donald Trump is no longer Kenya’s Bitch.
Less than a month after his bizarre visit with the Golden Commandant at the White House, where Kenya spewed a nonsensical, meandering, 10 minute, F-Bomb ladened, monologue, Kenya told the world that he had been misdiagnosed with Bipolar Disorder when he was actually merely sleep deprived.
Well, Kenya must have caught up on his sleep. He now claims that he has been used and become a Political Pawn. Kenya said: “My eyes are now wide open and now realize I’ve been used to spread messages I don’t believe in. I am distancing myself from politics and completely focusing on being Creative!!!”
Kenya also wants to clear his name after the Blexit campaign launched a line of Shirts and Hats that touted: “Design by Kanye West”. Kenya now claims that he never wanted any association with Blexit or it’s founder Candace Owens.
Candace Owens said: “Blexit is a renaissance movement and I am blessed to say that the Blexit logo and Blexit colors were created by my dear friend and superhero Kenya West”
Kenya wanting to set the record straight said: “I have nothing to do with Blexit”
Sarkes understands that we may never know the truth here and there are more questions than answers such as:
Was Kenya sleep deprived when he developed the Blexit clothing line and just doesn’t remember?
Is Kenya’s Bromance with his Orange Bitch really over?
While Kenya and Omarosa have turned on the Golden Brutha, will other Black supporters; Mike Tyson, Diamond & Silk, Terrel Ownes, Hershell Walker, and Dennis Rodman stay committed?
And where is the Black Guy with the White “Blacks for Trump” T-shirt at the Orange Monarch’s Political Rallies? He has been no where to be seen recently, has he turned on the Orange Brutha?
Will Sarkes need to walk back his prediction that the Golden Gulag will win the 2020 Presidential Election on the coat tails of Blacks? Since Sarkes is rarely wrong, he is confident that Black America will come thru for Orange MLK in 2020, after all, “What the hell do they have to lose”.
– The Orange Charmin boards Air Force One with Toilet Paper stuck to his shoe
Forget this brew ha ha over the Judge Kavanaugh Supreme Court Confirmation hearings, the big news from last week is that the Golden Cottonelle boarded Air Force 1 with a strip of Ass Wipe hanging off the back of his loafer.
“Many People Say”, Sarkes, Ass Wipe!, Ass Wipe!, what are you talking about? Well, when Sarkes was an Engineering student at the Missouri University of Science and Technology (S&T), toilet paper was called Ass Wipe. Sarkes cannot make this stuff up. This can be confirmed by thousands of Engineers who attended S&T in the 1970’s.
“Many People Say”, Sarkes, when you were an Engineering Student at S&T did you drink Beer? Sarkes responds: Sometimes Sarkes had too many beers. Sarkes liked beer. Sarkes does not like beer anymore. But Sarkes never drank beer to the point of blacking out. Sarkes is innocent, innocent of any charges associated with his time at S&T!
But Sarkes digresses, back of Point.
The Ass Wipe incident happened as The Orange Scotts was departing Minneapolis. After sticking with the president all the way up the stairs to Air Force 1, the Toilet paper finally loosened its grip once Trump walked aboard.
Now Sarkes says, who amongst us has not walked out of a toilet only to find that we were dragging a piece of Ass Wipe on our shoes or hanging out the bottom of our pants? But what is interesting here is that NO ONE stopped the Golden Papyrus from walking up the stairs to Air Force 1 with Ass Wipe stuck to his shoe, NO ONE? This was not just a small piece of Ass Wipe stuck to a shoe. Someone; the Secret Service, the Marine Guard, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Someone, had to see this Ass Wipe dragging behind the Orange Toilet Roll.
The Golden Crapper is always surrounded by at least a dozen people at all times. Is this just another step in the Mega Conspiracy to bring down the Reich of our Orange Fuhrer? History will show that this Conspiracy was Uuuuuge, a conspiracy of Demon Dems, Liberal Media, RINOs, and Benedict Arnolds. Is the Secret Service part of this Conspiracy?
Sarkeses White House Source, LEAKER, has told Sarkes that the Orange Thug is pissed that no-one stopped him from boarding Air Force 1 with Ass Wipe on his shoe. LEAKER says that the Golden Counter Puncher has ordered the FBI to determine which company; Proctor and Gamble, Kleenex, or the Scott Paper Company, produced the Ass Wipe that stuck to his shoe. There will be hell to pay.
Finally, the Orange Merchandiser is very familiar with Ass Wipe. The Trump Enterprises Merchandise offerings include: ties, suits, dress shirts, eyeglasses, spring water, vodka, education (Trump University), and of course, Ass Wipe.
– Sarkes believes that the Orange Gigolo is Bi-Sexual
Sarkes Connects the Dots where most do not even see the Dots. Sarkes connects the Dots and believes that the Golden Casanova is Bi-Sexual.
Dot 1: The Orange Skirt-Chaser is a Serial Adulterer who cheats on his wives with younger Big Breasted Women. The Golden Don Juan is also an self confessed P-Grabber of Big Breasted Women. It clear that the Orange Bird Dog is Heterosexual.
Dot 2: At the Republican National Convention in 2016, the Golden Retriever
promised to “do everything in my power to protect our LGBTQ citizens,”. Given the anti-LGBTQ plank in the GOP Platform, this declaration was heralded as a sign of hope that Trump would prove more moderate in his gay-rights policies than the GOP. This statement drove a Uuuuuuuuge applause from the GOPs in attendance, but it was later discovered that they were just responding to the “Loud Applause Now” signs being held up by Convention organizers. In any case, the Orange Creamsicle’s commitment to protect the LGBTQs is a departure from the Anti-GOP position against the LGBTQ community.
DOT 3: The Golden Goliath’s Bromance with his Boy Toy Vlads Putin was a head scratcher for all America. The Great GOP President Ronald Reagan once said about the Russian Commies: “Trust but Verify”. What Reagan really meant was “Don’t ever trust those Godless Commies”. Yet the Orange Oligarch continues to heap praise on Vlads Putin, Mr. KGB. It is suspected that the Bromance between Vlads Putin and the Golden Gulag is in trouble. Who knows what starts these lover’s spats.
DOT 3 Continued: And at his rally in West Virginia this weekend, the Orange Cheese Ball said of North Korean Dictator Kim Jong-un: “I like him. He likes me. I guess that’s OK. Am I allowed to say that?” Then the Golden Romeo got a little weird saying: “I was being really tough and so was he. And we would go back and forth. And then we fell in love. No, really. He wrote me beautiful letters. They were great letters. And then we fell in love.”
So, the Orange Cantaloupe Bromances with Vlads Putin and Kim Jong-un is evidence that the Golden Goose is Gay.
There you have it, it’s clear that Donald Trump is our first Bi-Sexual President……..or so we believe.