The Election WAS Rigged and Stolen!

Executive Summary:

  • Sarkes had previously analyzed the ways that the Deep State could Rig the Presidential Election
  • Sarkes now has proof that the Deep State has Rigged and Stolen the Presidential Election

In the Sarkes Corner published on October 13:  Voter Fraud & A Rigged Election, Sarkes analyzed the charges made by the Orange Chosen One that the Deep State was Rigging the November Presidential Election.  The Orange Profit claimed that the Deep State was:

  • Placing Fake Ballot Boxes in Conservative Neighborhoods and collecting, then trashing, the Ballots from unsuspecting Conservatives
  • Paying children to steal Ballots from Mail Boxes in Conservative neighborhoods, paying a bounty of $5 for each stolen Ballot
  • Rigging the Voter Rosters by adding Dead people who would then vote for Joe Biden
  • Sneaking into the US Illegal Mexicans to vote for Joe Biden, just like Hillary Clinton
  • Paying corrupt Postal Workers to divert Ballots from Conservative neighborhoods to Poor Liberal neighborhoods where they would be filled out for Joe Biden
  • Printing Ballots in Foreign countries with special disappearing Ink that would fade out any ballots cast for the Orange Victim

After that exhaustive analysis on the many ways that the Deep State was Rigging the November election, Sarkes concluded that it WAS quite possible that the November election could be Rigged.

Fast Forward to Today

As you know, Sarkes had been off the Grid for about 3 weeks after the election.  Sarkeses head had been spinning with the daily political news, charges, acquisitions and general bull shit that we Americans were exposed.  So Sarkes took a Mental Health Break, focusing on re runs of Judge Judy, and just recently retuned to the busy Sarkes Corner News Room.

After 3 weeks taking a Mental Health Break, with good Coffee and reruns of Judge Judy, Sarkes is back in the Sarkes Corner News Room

At the first Editorial Board Meeting with Sarkes Corner reporters after his return, Sarkes sensed that something was seriously wrong.  Sarkes Corner reporters, mostly graduates from the finest Journalism School in the country, the University of Missouri, had their heads down and avoiding eye contact with Sarkes.  Sarkes told the reporters: “Listen, you know Sarkes is cool, collected, flexible, unflappable, a Stable Genius, so come out with it, what’s wrong.”

Finally, Sarkes was given the Harsh Truth.  The Sarkes Corner Investigative Reporters told Sarkes that they had uncovered indisputable evidence that the November HAD been Rigged……………………and that their evidence was against Sarkes sweet granddaughter, 3 year old Addison Katz-Korkoian.  

Sarkes Corner Reporters charged granddaughter Addie with Voter Fraud and more

Needless to say, Sarkes was in shock and calmly asked the Reporters what evidence they had to charge little Addie with these serious charges.  The Reporters reluctantly provided the evidence.

On October 29, a Sarkes Corner field team found little Addie, assisted by her mother Meredith, STEALING Ballots from a Washington DC Ballot Box.

Little Addie was allegedly receiving $5 for each stolen Conservative Ballot 

Next, the Sarkes Corner Reporters, accessing Addie’s Facebook Account, found the following evidence proving that she had illegally voted for Joe Biden.

Little Addie, at 3 years old, admitted to have voted for Joe Biden

Sarkes, a Truth Machine, had no choice but to report these felonies to the proper authorities.  Sarkes first call was to the Orange Exalted Leader’s personal attorney, William Barr.  Sarkes was told to leave a message but to not expect a return call as Barr was booked up until January 20.  

Personal Attorney William Barr, working on his resume, was too busy to talk to Sarkes

Sarkes then called the head of the Orange Eminence’s Election Legal Team, Rudy (Rud the Dud) Giuliani.  Rud the Dud was busy getting a hair cut and dye but Sarkes was assured that Rudy would get back to Sarkes.

Rud the Dud would surely use this evidence to prove Massive, Uuuuuuge Voter Fraud

After those calls, Sarkes decided to appeal to the Highest Authority, and called the Orange Premier.  Sarkes was told that the Orange Commander in Tweets was watching Fox News, but would call Sarkes during a commercial break between Tucker Carlson and Sean O’Hannity.   

The Orange Nielsen has Split Screen capabilities so he can simultaneously watch Fox News AND One America News Network

True to his word, and when has the Orange Commandant ever lied to the American People, Sarkes received a call back.  A transcript of that call is next:

Sarkes:  Mr. President, thank you so much for calling me back.

Donald Trump:  Anytime Sarkes, I am extremely busy, but never too busy to call you.  What can I do for you.

Sarkes:  Well Mr. President, I have good news and bad news.  The good news is that I have indisputable evidence that the November Election was Rigged and Stolen from you. I have forwarded that information to the head of your Legal Team, Rudy Giuliani.

Donald Trump: That is good news Sarkes.  This was an election that we won easily. We won it by a lot. Very sad to say it, this election was rigged and we can’t let that happen. We can’t let it happen for our country. This election has to be turned around.

Donald Trump:  Thanks Sarkes, but what is the bad news?

Sarkes:  Well Mr. President, I regret to report that the main perpetrator is my sweet 3 year old Grandaughter, Addison Katz-Korkoian.  What I need is for you is to Pardon Addison.  She is too young to spend time in the Slammer and Sarkes commits to work with Addision to convert her to become a Great Conservative like you and Ronald Reagan.  I am asking for you to give Addison a break by giving her an unconditional Pardon.

Donald Trump:  Considerate done Sarkes.  I will get on it right away, well, after I watch Laura Ingraham tonight, she is one fine looking skit eh?  I am heading to my Virginia Golf resort tomorrow morning but someone should call you after that to confirm the Pardon.

Sarkes: Thanks Mr. President, see you soon at Mir-A-Lago.

The Orange Bird Dog would love to P-Grab Laura Ingraham
Sarkes and Trump at a recent Rally in Naples, FL

Florida Man Saves Puppy from a Gator

Executive Summary:

  • A man in Florida rescued his puppy from the jaws of an alligator 
  • The puppy is OK, the Gator is OK, the Man is OK, the Man’s Cigar is OK

Thanks to the smartest Subscriber to Sarkes Corner, Dr. Todd Ruecker, for this story from Sarkeses back yard.

First of all, “Many People Say” Sarkes, have you been on sabbatical?  We haven’t received an Award Winning Sarkes Corner is a while.  We even called our Internet Provider and Email Provider to see if the Trump Administration had censored Sarkes Corner!!  What gives??!!!

Dear Subscribers, don’t fret, Sarkes Corner was not censored by the Orange Pulitzer. No, Sarkes was not on sabbatical.  Simply stated, Sarkes was taking a Mental Health break as the daily drama since Election night has made Sarkes nauseous.  Alas, with rest and relaxation, limiting TV time to reruns of Judge Judy, and avoiding ALL Cable News, Sarkes is renewed and ready to resume his journey to a Nobel Prize in Literature.

Sarkes had a mental health scare, but is now refreshed and back in the game

 An Estero, Florida man, Richard Wilbanks, rescued his puppy from the jaws of an alligator, diving under the water and wrestling the reptile all without dropping the cigar in his mouth.  “Many People Say” Sarkes, don’t you live in Estero, Florida?  Indeed, Sarkes does live in Estero, Florida (formerly Bonita Springs) but does not know Richard Wilbanks.  You see, Estero has a bi-model demographic:  Gated Country Club communities where residents wear collared golf shirts tucked into nice shorts, AND, other communities where residents wear sleeveless T-shirts and Cargo shorts or Phys Ed shorts.  These two Estero communities do cross paths at Publix but Sarkes does not remember meeting Wilbanks.

Richard Wilbanks does not live in a gated community in Estero

Wilbanks, 74, was walking his Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Gunner, around the pond near his retirement home when the alligator raced up from the water and grabbed the dog.  Wilbanks said: It came out of the water like a missile.  I never thought an alligator could be that fast. It was so quick.”  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnyghAjzu1Q

The vicious attack on little Gunner was captured on Camera

Cameras set up by the Florida Wildlife Federation captured the encounter, which shows Wilbanks in the pond, his head submerged as he tries to grab a hold of the alligator. He then emerges holding the reptile, which still has the dog in its jaws. In Wilbank’s jaws is a cigar – which he never drops.  Wilbanks moves to the edge of the pond while trying to pry the dog free. Eventually he succeeds, and Gunner runs away while Wilbanks tries to extract his own hands from the creature’s mouth.

A rush of adrenalin allowed Wilbanks save his cigar

Gunner has since seen a vet, and while he suffered a small puncture wound to his stomach, he is otherwise fine. Wilbanks suffered puncture wounds to his hands.

Gunner and Wilbanks suffered minor puncture wounds but are fine

It is easy for us to place blame on the Gator, but Sarkes digs deeper and cautions all to not jump to this conclusion.  You see, it is a requirement in most Florida communities that Dogs must be on a leash when out of the house.  In Florida, a strong Red state, this requirement is often ignored as many of Sarkeses neighbors do not want the Government interfering with their Rights.  

Don’t Blame Gunner, he is innocent, he can’t put the leash on himself

Also, most ponds and lakes where Gators reside are clearly marked with warning signs, and this was the case in Wilbank’s neighborhood. 

Signs clearly warn citizens that there could be danger in the lake 

Wilbanks said that he will be keeping Gunner on a leash and at least 10 feet from the pond from now on.  Duh, really, you figured this out all by yourself!!

In the end, all is well, the puppy is OK, the Gator is OK, the Man is OK, the Man’s Cigar is OK.