Caronavirus Crimes

Executive Summary:

– The Caronavirus is bringing out the worse in Americans

– Caronavirus related Crime is on the rise

Sarkes, a Constitutional Scholar, is on record that our Constitution gives all Americans Rights un-paralleled anywhere else in the world………including the Right to be Stupid.

The Great American Philosopher George Carlin said it best about Americans

One such stupid American is Gloricia Woody from Oklahoma City, OK.  Woody had entered a McDonalds restaurant despite the dining area being closed because of coronavirus restrictions.  The McDonalds Drive-Thru was open but Woody was too hungry to wait in the line.

Goricia Woody, craving a Big Mac and not wanting to wait in the Drive-Thru line, is heading to the Hoosegow

When employees asked Woody to leave, she refused and got into a scuffle with the employees. Employees eventually forced Woody outside, but she re-entered the restaurant with a handgun and fired three rounds.  One McDonalds worker was shot in the arm, two others were struck by shrapnel, and a fourth worker suffered a head injury.  The injuries were not life threatening.

Lines are long at McDonalds Drive-Thru these days as customer need their tasty Big Macs and Fillet-O-Fish

The incident is one of a number reported across the country that authorities said were related to restrictions put in place to combat the spread of the coronavirus. 

In Michigan, a Security Guard at a Family Dollar Store in Flint, MI, was tragically fatally shot after arguing with a customer who did not want to wear a face mask in the store, a mandate in place by Michigan for all retail stores.  Ramonyea Bishop, 23, and his stepfather, Larry Teague, 44, have been charged with first-degree murder.

Retail Stores in Michigan require customers to wear Face Masks
Bishop and Tucker are heading to the Hoosegow charged with Murder

In Southern California, a customer wore a Ku Klux Klan Hood during a trip to the grocery store – – – and repeatedly ignored staff requests to remove it.   The incident took place at a Vons Super Market in San Diego one day after health officials in the county ordered residents to wear face coverings in public to stymie the spread of Covid-19.

This Great American wore his KKK Hood to comply with Government Mask requirements

When asked at a recent 2 hour Caronavirus Press Conference at the White about these 3 Caronavirus incidents, his Orange Majesty said:

“I am not responsible for these acts of crime.  I don’t take responsibility at all.  These crimes were caused by a set of circumstances and rules, regulations and specifications from Obama, he is to blame.” 

“Now listen, the guy in the KKK hood should have found another mask, but there are very fine people on both sides”

“They should throw the book at those 2 Black Guys that killed the Security Guard in Michigan, they are animals.  I told my personal lawyer, William Barr, not to call that woman in Michigan (Governor Gretchen Witmer), she is useless.”

“If they convict the woman in the McDonalds shooting I will have my personal Lawyer William Barr issue her a Pardon.  America depends on McDonalds to provide tasty Big Macs, Quarter Pounders with Cheese, Fillet-O-Fish, Fries, Cokes and Shakes.  If McDonalds does not get their act together, I will order the Defense Production Act on McDonalds.”

Like the Orange Eminence always says: “Its Obamas Fault”
The Orange Carnivore prefers McDonalds Big Macs over Fillet-O-Fish 
The Orange Messiahs personal lawyer, William Barr, is very busy these days