Cracker Justice?

Executive Summary:

  • A Florida woman was charged after giving husband’s guns to police
  • Huh, Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my

Thanks to Sarkeses High School buddy Chuckie Chuckie Kofron for another great case study of Florida Crackerdom.  You see, recently retired Chuckie Chuckie had been considering buying property in Florida but is now apprehensive after reading the stories in Sarkes Corner on the antics of the Heat Packing, Florida Cracker.  Like Fox News Fair and Balanced, Sarkes passes no judgement, Sarkes reports, You decide.

Sarkeses Cracker neighbors never cease to amaze.  Sometimes, the Police and Prosecutors in Florida, the Gunshine State, never cease to amaze also. 

A Florida Cracker or Crackerette are usually docile specimens.  A Florida Cracker or Cracerette packing Heat is an inevitable accident waiting to happen.

A Florida woman’s effort to protect herself from domestic violence has become a flashpoint in the debate over gun rights and victims’ safety.

Crackerette Courtney Irby gave her estranged husband’s guns to police after he was charged with domestic violence-aggravated battery, only to find herself arrested for Theft.  Huh, Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my.

Crackerette Courtney Irby was arrested for stealing her Cracker Husbands Heat

Crackerette Irby spent six days in jail on charges of Armed Burglary and Grand Theft after she retrieved an Assault Rifle and handgun from her husband’s apartment and gave them to the Lakeland Police. Cracker Joseph Irby was spending one day in jail at the time, accused of ramming into her car after a divorce hearing.

Cracker Irby Packs Heat and is a real Piece of Work

After her husband’s arrest, Crackerette Irby petitioned for a temporary injunction for protection, which was granted. Federal law prohibits people under a domestic violence restraining order from possessing guns, but it’s up to local law enforcement to enforce it.  Lakeland Police DID NOT take the Cracker Abuser’s Heat away!  Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my,

Crackerette Irby told police that she believed he wouldn’t turn in his guns himself, so she took action. According to her arrest report, she said she entered her husband’s apartment through a locked door without his permission and took the guns to a police station.

A Cracker with an Assault Weapon like this is an accident waiting to happen

“So you’re telling me you committed an armed burglary?” the Lakeland Police Officer asked her.   Crackerette Irby replied: ”Yes, I am but he wasn’t going to turn them in so I am doing it”.   The Lakeland Police Office then arrested Crackerette Irby.   Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my.

The arrest of an abused Crackeretee by the Lakeland Police drew the ire of many.  State Rep. Anna Eskamani of Orlando tweeted that it’s “ridiculous” to arrest a woman in this kind of situation.  She sent a letter to State Attorney Brian Haas asking that Crackerette Irby not be prosecuted. She cited research showing the presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation makes it five times more likely a woman will be murdered.  No surprise there.

While federal law prohibits people under domestic violence restraining orders and convicted of domestic violence from possessing guns, local law enforcement and prosecutors don’t have the tools they need to enforce those restrictions, Eskamani said in her letter to the state attorney.  “These loopholes are major contributors to the deadly relationship between domestic violence and firearms,” Eskamani said.

Cracker Irby’s charges involve an altercation that began with a shouting match after the divorce hearing. According to his arrest report, they both got into their cars and then he used his vehicle to strike her back bumper several times, running her off the road.  Huh, Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my.

In requesting that she be released on bond, Crackerette Irby’s attorney argued that she didn’t commit theft since she didn’t take the guns for her personal use and didn’t benefit by taking them.  Huh, Uh, What, Are you kidding me, Oh my.

Gun rights advocates and the NRA are in favor of prosecuting Crackerette Irby while her supporters launched a fundraising campaign for her legal fees.

The NRA is out to protect the Gun Rights of all Americans, even hot headed irrational Crackers

No, Sarkes cannot make this stuff up.  Only in America, Only in Florida, Only in the Cracker Kingdom can this happen.  This is Cracker Justice.  Sarkes Ponders, what would Judge Judy say about Cracker Justice?

Judge Judy is now sporting a Ruth Bader Ginsberg look, and Sarkes thought Judge Judy was a Conservative, Hmmm