Florida Cracker Charged with DUI

Executive Summary:

– It is not unusual for a Florida Cracker to Drink and Drive

– What makes this special is that this Florida Cracker chugged his can of Beer during the DUI stop

Sarkes continues to lament that he cannot make this stuff up. Sarkeses neighbors, the Florida Cracker, never ceases to amaze. But here at Sarkes Corner, you get the Truth, Sarkes Corner is a Truth Machine. Sarkes Corner – No Spin, You Win.

A Florida Cracker, Daryl Royal Riedel, was pulled over by police on suspicion of drunk driving but continued to drink even after being stopped by a sheriff’s deputy. While waiting for the deputy to approach his car, Cracker Ridel raised a can of Busch beer and chugged down the suds.

Cracker Daryl Royal Riedel
Busch Beer – A favorite brew of the Cracker

Minutes earlier, Cracker Riedel had sped off after being pulled over for the first time due to a suspended license, leading police on a two-mile car chase. Cracker Riedel told the deputies that he drove away the first time because he was scared.

Cracker Riedel has 3 previous DUI convictions and is out on bail for a 4th DUI infraction. Apparently drinking and driving by Crackers in Florida is no big deal.

Cracker Riedel is now facing charges including felony DUI, fleeing from a deputy, driving with a suspended license, and failure to submit a breath test.
Asked why he drove with a suspended license, Cracker Riedel said, “because I still have to work.”

Sarkeses analysis:

While Florida Crackers score very low on the Socio-Economic and Intelligence measures, many are hard workers, albeit working minimum wage jobs. One of Sarkeses Rich, Old, White, Florida neighbors describe the Florida Cracker as “the Salt of the Earth”.

Sarkes is still investigating how Cracker Riedel can have 3 previous DUI convictions, been charged with a 4th, and is still driving! Has he been given lenient sentences by Juries of his Cracker Peers? This makes no sense as the Gunshine State, with a super majority GOP state legislature, should be tough on crime. Something here stinks.

In any case, Sarkes understands why Cracker Riedel would chug his beer in the presence of deputies who are ready to arrest him. While Bush Beer is a low end, cheap beer, it’s like Champaign to a uneducated, underemployed, Florida Cracker.

Florida Crackers Chugging Beer

Interviewed after his arrest, Cracker Riedels lawyer said it was unfair that Police will not let citizens “suspected” of DUI to finish their beers before being arrested. Since Cracker Riedel is a solid part of the Orange Budweiser’s Base, the lawyer plans on contacting the White House to get Cracker Riedel a Presidential Pardon.